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You have won. Congratulations. Arrive at Gate 4 three hours prior to first pitch during a home game of your choice. Ask any member of the security staff for Rita. Once Rita arrives, be sure to recite the Gettysburg Address and then promptly make loud noises as if you are a stallion. Get down on all fours and pat your back before screaming aloud, “Ride me to yer thee destiny me Lady!” You will then instantly transform into an alarm clock which will be placed in the home players club house. From there, you’ll have a front row seat to enjoy a very unique vantage point for a game. One which no other fan has ever experienced. Congratulations, once more. Should you have any recommendations for modifications to your prize, feel free to submit a formal request to Max the Dog.

I haven’t thought of or heard that name spoken for months. What a glorious blessing.

I was talking to some dude perched way up in the suites at 31st & Wentworth. Ages ago, Ozzie Guillen plopped him up there on the highest ledge, and no one’s ever managed to stretch far enough to pull him back down.

Post of the season winner. Close the books folks, it’s in the bag.

I’m firmly in the “break the record again” camp. Our guy Jerry doesn’t deserve a god damned thing. Once the teams sold, I’ll start rooting for them to win again.

As a community, let’s put forth a collective roster of things to keep our eyes on. This thread was inspired by someone mention of Shane Smith in today’s game thread… so we’ll begin there. I’m looking forward to seeing how he fairs with our team. Being that he’s a Rule 5 pickup, dude is destined for Chicago. It will be cool to track his journey with Banister and Katz, I will not be surprised if he winds up in our rotation. Within this thread, please limit any “Thing to be Excited About” item to one per person. Since there are likely very few options, having a limit will allow for others to join in on “the fun.” Oh joy… so much fun!

He’s on my “2025 Things to be Excited About List”. To be sure, it is a short fucking list.

I forgot that we have Narvaez back in the fold. He’ll provide some quality modeling for the younger catchers and some MLB depth incase we have an apocalypse.

Gee, thanks.

Holy f*** - if awards or wins were handed out for drafting and trading for the most injured players, we would be DESTROYING the Majors. 😆🤦🏻‍♂️

Oh please be so… please please please be so. Would be the best White Sox news to hit the press in the last 20 years! Go Sox Go!!!!

Did Colas actually just take a fly ball off his forehead? I can’t believe what I’m seeing with my own eyes. It is oh so glorious! 😆

Well we’re picking up right where we left off… looking like a little league practice squad already! 😆⚾️

EDIT: The local village idiot’s friend ended up still having t-mobile after all. Disregard and delete if you’d like.

I no longer have t-mobile. My friend who had t-mobile also no longer has that carrier. I am broke as a joke. So… any Soxtalk brother out there who’s willing to hook your local village idiot out, shoot me a dm please.

I’ve been in that state for the entire fucking off-season. Life has been a god damned doozie as of late. Yay!

Crazy we ended up with Justin Dunn 😆 Hopefully he can realize the promise he once had.

Ouch. I hope he gets exposed to some of the newer treatment modalities.

😂

Hopefully Rubenstine will soon be doing his advocating from a jail cell.

Man…

I don’t think anything can beat our great triumph from last season.

Even horseshit terrible white flops baseball!

Why again would he sign here? I suppose we have the pitching guru and there’s the certainty of basically guaranteeing himself a playoff spot via trade deadline season.