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What books are you reading?


Texsox

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Brontes are evil.

 

specially charlotte and emily.

Wuthering Heights :puke

 

Here is what I have learned in my English class:

The Return of the Native sucks

Wuthering Heights sucks

Beowulf is ok.

Pride and Prejudice sucks

Grendel owns :headbang

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Beowulf is ok.

 

Grendel owns :headbang

Beowulf is pretty cool. Which translation did you read? It was part of a Monsters in Lit class I took last year. Any book that spends so miuch time drinking beer and telling tales has got to be good.

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I think we start reading that in April in my English class.  What's the premise of it?

It is the oldest English language story. It is an epic poem about a Danish hero who basically kicks the crap out of a couple monsters, he is King for a long time, then dies fighting a dragon. Lots of drinking and boasting in a Mead Hall.

 

You will read a translation from Old English which makes the story much easier to read.

 

I also recomend the Spark Notes study guide. You can read them at sparknotes.com or buy them at Barnes and Noble.

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so these people are like f*** A MONSTER IS KILLING US and beowulf is all WHERE IS THAT BEOTCH so he waits around and grendel shows up and grendels only weakness is his arms -cuz he is a trex- so beowulf tears off his arms and grendel yells OH s*** THAT HERTZ then beowulf beats grendel with his own arms

 

grendels mama shows up cause he is a mamas boy and his mom is all pissed off WHO THE f*** WHOOPED MY SON and beowulf says I DID, WHORE so they go back to the grendel house which is underwater or in a swamp or something and beowulf finds a sword down there and cuts out her falopian tubes and bring them back to the villagers who make him king with a crown of ovaries

 

later a dragon starts roasting chickens and children so beowulf must fight it so he goes in the cave and they simultaneously deliver fatal wounds to each other: to the dragons neck and to beowulf's cuticles. some dude shows up and hes like WOW THERE IS A LOT OF TREASURE IN THIS CAVE. INSTEAD OF BEING POORASS, STARVING PEASANTS WE CAN BE RICH but beowulf is like f*** NO, DOCTOR PEON, YOU BURY THAT TREASURE WITH ME IN A MOUND OF DIRT

 

the moral of the story is that you shouldnt f*** around with dinosaurs

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It is the oldest English language story. It is an epic poem about a Danish hero who basically kicks the crap out of a couple monsters, he is King for a long time, then dies fighting a dragon. Lots of drinking and boasting in a Mead Hall.

 

You will read a translation from Old English which makes the story much easier to read.

 

I also recomend the Spark Notes study guide. You can read them at sparknotes.com or buy them at Barnes and Noble.

I thought u were talkin bout Hamlet 1st time I read that. :lol:

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so these people are like f*** A MONSTER IS KILLING US and beowulf is all WHERE IS THAT BEOTCH so he waits around and grendel shows up and grendels only weakness is his arms -cuz he is a trex- so beowulf tears off his arms and grendel yells OH s*** THAT HERTZ  then beowulf beats grendel with his own arms

 

grendels mama shows up cause he is a mamas boy and his mom is all pissed off WHO THE f*** WHOOPED MY SON and beowulf says I DID, WHORE so they go back to the grendel house which is underwater or in a swamp or something and beowulf finds a sword down there and cuts out her falopian tubes and bring them back to the villagers who make him king with a crown of ovaries

 

later a dragon starts roasting chickens and children so beowulf must fight it so he goes in the cave and they simultaneously deliver fatal wounds to each other: to the dragons neck and to beowulf's cuticles.  some dude shows up and hes like WOW THERE IS A LOT OF TREASURE IN THIS CAVE.  INSTEAD OF BEING POORASS, STARVING PEASANTS WE CAN BE RICH but beowulf is like f*** NO, DOCTOR PEON, YOU BURY THAT TREASURE WITH ME IN A MOUND OF DIRT

 

the moral of the story is that you shouldnt f*** around with dinosaurs

Yep, that's hou me mome tould it' to mee when I woas a wee lade. :headbang

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