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Seven Dollar Ballpark Frank Made From The Finest Hog Anuses

SAN DIEGO--Safeco Park vendors defended their decision to charge seven dollars for a hot dog yesterday, claiming that the franks were made from the “finest hog anuses” money can buy.

“You pay more because we use the best ingredients,” said Michael Wilson, president of AMG Foods, which handles the vending at San Diego’s new ballpark. “The hog anuses you are eating come from the finest hogs in the land. The cow tongues, intestinal tracts, and various other meat byproducts are absolutely top-of-the line. Seven dollars is the absolute minimum we can charge, believe me.”

Wilson also defended his high-priced bottled water, claiming that it makes all other water “taste like steaming dogs***.”

 

 

:lolhitting

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This one might hit a little close to home for some of you....

 

http://www.thebrushback.com/Archives/MLB2004_full.htm

ROTFLMFAO :lolhitting :lolhitting :lolhitting

 

This line kills me...

 

"He's a good kid," says Edna, from her home in Des Moines. "At least he's not out on the street selling drugs or anything. I know he'll be fine. It's just a tough job market out there right now. At least I don't have to worry about him getting some girl pregnant since he has no chance of getting laid ever
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Immediately when I read "Gatorade introduced new Powerade-flavored Gatorade", I knew this site was gonna be good.

:lol: :lolhitting I didn't have a chance to look at the link when I read this earlier b/c I had to go to work, but after looking at the site, it's awesome! Thanks for posting this, Cheat! :headbang

I love the Berman and the "Prominant Player to be traded to prominent team" articles.

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Player Who Left Everything On Field Forced To Drive Home Naked

  PHILADELPHIA--Reggie Walker, a hard-nosed, hustling utility infielder for the Philadelphia Phillies, was forced to drive home naked Sunday after leaving everything he had on the field. His bat, glove, uniform, jockstrap, wedding ring, and gold chain were left in a pile on the Citizens Bank Park infield grass. Walker said he had no regrets about his actions, and that he was just trying to impress Manager Larry Bowa.

“I know that’s the kind of player Larry was, and I know that’s the kind of player he wants on his team,” said Walker. “I just wanted to make a name for myself, and after coming off the field buck naked, I think I probably did.”

    Unfortunately for Walker, he was demoted to Triple A the next day. Bowa complimented the player, calling him “hard-nosed” but saying he tends to take things “a little to literally.”

 

:lolhitting

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