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You might be a Democrat if . . .


Texsox

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You might be a Democrat if you believe . . .

 

You believe our government must do it because everyone in Europe does.

 

You can't talk about foreign policy without using the word conspiracy.

 

You think Ralph Nader makes a lot of sense.

 

The closest you've ever actually been to a rain forest is a Sting concert.

 

You don't understand why anyone was bothered by Jane's trip to Hanoi.

 

You think solar energy is being held back by those greedy oil companies.

 

You would rather have the Federal government make your investments than Fidelity.

 

You've never had to worry about marginal tax rates.

 

You have to use the term "mean spirited" in every sentence when talking about welfare reform.

 

You actually expect to collect Social Security.

 

You think the State of Florida should have tried to reform Ted Bundy.

 

You have a "Run, Jesse Run" bumper sticker on your diesel Volvo.

 

You think the Great Society has actually worked.

 

You got teary eyed during the film "The American President."

 

You think Ayn Rand is an African currency.

 

You get goose bumps when Barbra Streisand sings.

 

You think political patronage describes the Kennedy family.

 

You've tried to get in touch with Hillary's broker.

 

You think the Free Market is where they hand out Government cheese.

 

You think Carter should be on Mt. Rushmore.

 

You believe personal injury lawyers when they say they are just trying to defend the little guy.

 

You think that Vietnam and Bosnia are two completely different situations.

 

You know that those profit mongering drug companies could find a cure for AIDS if they really wanted to.

 

You like Rolling Stone, but they should really get rid of that PJ O'Rourke guy.

 

You actually believe the NY Times and Washington Post.

 

You know at least one Vegan.

 

You trust Teddy Kennedy when he said that she was driving.

 

You'd rather own Birkenstock than Merck Stock.

 

You think that the Teamsters are misunderstood.

 

You think public housing is great, but just NIMBY (Not In My Back Yard).

 

You think the anti-war protestors from '60s are the real heroes.

 

You think that Supply Side Economics refers to your dope dealer's stash.

 

You would send your kids to public schools, if they just had better extracurriculars.

 

You think Al Gore really did invent the internet.

 

You actually think that poverty can be abolished.

 

You think that Joan Baez had something to say.

 

You admire the Swedish welfare system.

 

You know that Jefferson really meant to say "Entitled to Happiness."

 

You think the Flat Tax should be at 95%.

 

You go to Gay Pride Day parades so that no one can call you homophobic.

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and the Republican version is the vice preisdent saying f*** You to a US Senator on the Senate floor, a subject yso many here manged to avoid discussing a few weeks ago?

When are you going to join my campaign, cw?

 

They All Do It for America, 2004.

 

Edit: These two candidates suck. They really do.

 

:lol:

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and the Republican version is the vice preisdent saying f*** You to a US Senator on the Senate floor, a subject yso many here manged to avoid discussing a few weeks ago?

Aw shucks, he didn't mean it . . .

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When are you going to join my campaign, cw?

 

They All Do It for America, 2004.

 

Edit:  These two candidates suck.  They really do.

 

:lol:

Actually, all the candidates suck. Remember all the indie candidates that are running. Those that have not sold out to the machines.

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What's he got to do with it?

 

Shaft!

 

Who's the black private dick

That's a sex machine to all the chicks?

(Shaft!)

You're damn right

 

Who is the man

That would risk his neck for his brother man?

(Shaft!)

Can ya dig it?

 

Who's the cat that won't cop out

When there's danger all about

(Shaft!)

Right on

 

You see this cat Shaft is a bad mother--

(Shut your mouth)

But I'm talkin' about Shaft

(Then we can dig it)

 

He's a complicated man

But no one understands him but his woman

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