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October 2004 Quotes of the Month


Texsox

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Flasoxjim in response to a post in the thread on a surfer being picked up by a whale.

 

 

...felt the ocean swirl under him and was lifted up by the giant mammal.

 

 

 

I read that part and thought for a second it was a quote from Star Jones' new husband talking about their wedding night...

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Apu in response to the thread about the woman who urged people to vote for John Kerry in her obituary

 

[story text]

But, he says, since his wife no longer can vote he was determined to make sure her voice was heard.

 

 

 

They obviously don't live in Chicago. /obvious

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  • 2 weeks later...

From the 'Fan sues Marlins' thread...The Cheat dropped this hilarious 'article'.

 

CHICAGO (AP) - A man sued a Florida Marlins fan, the Associated Press, and his internet provider, alleging his time was wasted by reading an article about a superflous litigation.

 

The Cheat, 25, claims he read the article on the afternoon of October 17th.  The article announced the year old lawsuit brought by a Florida Marlins fan against Juan Pierre and the Marlins organization.

 

Mr. Cheat is seeking unspecified damages, though they are thought to be in the $1MIL range.

 

Cheat's attorney said the article was a waste of both bandwidth and column-inches.

 

When reached for comment on Sunday, Mr. Cheat said "I felt dumber for having read that article.  I could have been doing much better things with my time, like adding to my already-been-chewed gum collection.

 

"It's about time we sent a message to those litgious [explicative removed].  The only way they are going to understand that these suits, and the articles about them, are a waste of time, is to actually get slapped in the face with one."

 

The Florida Marlins fan, The Associated Press, and Cheat's internet provider could not be reached for comment, but are expected to file a coutersuit.

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It doesn't work, I tried it with a Dr. Seuss book.

 

"One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, wanna do me?"

 

This fantastic nugget of worditude was uttered by Palehosefan in response to a signed first edition Tom Sawyer signed by Samuel Clemens would be a good conversation starter.

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From winodj in the SSI thread. It is always nice when someone takes the time to state their opinion with grace and style.

 

I think its easier to fund aid for things we don't see every day. Which is strange to me because you think its the other way around... but I've noticed a tendency among people, myself included, to see problems next to me and try to hide from them or take out their frustration on the people who represent the problem rather than the problem itself.

 

 

EM: you're missing my point. We live in a country that has created a basic safety net to protect the weakest among us. Some of these people need help for life. In my view, a responsible society would do a little to keep these people both safe for themselves and ourselves.

 

I don't know this dude who lives down your street. I don't know his family, I don't know thing one about him. I just know that I would rather have the government provide enough for him to stay fed and housed rather than hungry and on the street, and more likely to do something that would keep him in prison. Not just because its the right thing to do, but because it would be cheaper. It costs a lot of money to put a guy away.

 

For every guy on SSI that f***ed himself with drugs, there's a vet who developed a psychosis in his 30's that has made him unable to cope with life. Not harmful enough to be hospitalized, but not capable of functioning in our society normally. There's a mentally retarded adult who's parents have finally passed on and he has no other way of supporting himself. There's a woman who was brain damaged because of being in a car that was hit by a drunk driver and, through no fault of her own, is now unable to work. If taking care of the hundreds of thousands of people means the occasional excess, I'm not going to call for the destruction of the entire system.

 

I'm not happy with fraud, but fixing it doesn't mean throwing the baby out with the bathwater.

:notworthy
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QUOTE (Texsox @ Oct 26 2004, 05:04 PM)

 

npr story

 

Obama is a big celebrity in Kenyan. A brewery has named a beer in his honor, The Senator. 

 

And the reply from the Critic...

 

 

 

And in a related story, Alan Keyes had a breakfast cereal named after him.

It's called Crazy f***ing Nut Crunch.

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