Getting Married?

[mreye]

I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when quite near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.

 

 

One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the Wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister.

 

 

I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door.

 

 

I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."

 

 

The moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car

[IlliniKrush]

LMAO, that's solid

[Kogs35]

LOL thats too funny

[LosMediasBlancas]

Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday and I wasn't feeling too good that

morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and

say, "Happy Birthday!" and probably have a present for me. As it

turned out, she didn't even say good morning, let alone any happy

birthday. I thought, well,

that's wives for you, the children will remember... The children came in

to

breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I was

feeling pretty low and despondent... As I walked into my office, my

secretary Janet said, "Good morning, Boss. Happy Birthday!" And I felt a

little better that someone had remembered. I worked until noon, then Janet

knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside,

and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me." I said, "By

George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. "Let's go!" We went

to

lunch. We didn't go where we normally go; instead we went out to a private

little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the

way

back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We

don't

need to go back to the office, do we?" I said, "No, I guess not." She

said,

"Let's go to my apartment." After arriving at her apartment she said,

"Boss,

if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into

something

more comfortable." She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes,

she

came out carrying a huge birthday cake --- followed by my wife, children,

and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday. And I just sat

there

--- on the couch --- naked.

[EvilJester99]

One night a woman wakes up to find her husband isn't in bed next to her. She gets up and goes downstairs and finds him in the kitchen and he is crying. She says "honey what's the matter?" He said, "Well you remember 20 years ago when your father caught us together and he told me either I would have to marry you or go to jail?" She said, Yes I do. He says, "Well I would have gotten out today".

[KipWellsFan]

lol

[WilliamTell]

lol these are all great

[HuskyCaucasian]

Eye, where did you find that? THat is hysterical. I highly doubt it is a true story. lol

[HuskyCaucasian]

LosMediasBlancas, I've heard of a similar urban legand. It's hysterical.