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ESPN Loser Has This To Say about the Sox


Southside hitmen

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The White Sox reached the All-Star break with a nine-game lead in the AL Central, but the doubters are still out there. Count ESPN.com columnist Bill Simmons among them.

 

In his midseason look at the AL, he gives the South Siders a couple of dubious awards. First is "The Napoleon Dynamite Award for Most Inexplicable Success Story."

 

 

"How are the White Sox headed for 112 wins right now?" Simmons writes. "Really, 112 wins? Does that seem reasonable for a team with nobody hitting above .280 and Dustin Hermanson as their closer?"

 

Simmons also picks on right-hander Jon Garland. Noting that Garland is on pace for 25 wins but only 110 strikeouts, he bestows on him "The James Baldwin Memorial Award for Best Candidate for a Second-Half Collapse."

 

"Would you say Garland is another James Baldwin or another Tommy John?" Simmons asks. "I'm leaning toward another Baldwin."

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QUOTE(Southside hitmen @ Jul 11, 2005 -> 11:32 PM)
The White Sox reached the All-Star break with a nine-game lead in the AL Central, but the doubters are still out there. Count ESPN.com columnist Bill Simmons among them.

 

In his midseason look at the AL, he gives the South Siders a couple of dubious awards. First is "The Napoleon Dynamite Award for Most Inexplicable Success Story."

 

 

"How are the White Sox headed for 112 wins right now?" Simmons writes. "Really, 112 wins? Does that seem reasonable for a team with nobody hitting above .280 and Dustin Hermanson as their closer?"

 

Simmons also picks on right-hander Jon Garland. Noting that Garland is on pace for 25 wins but only 110 strikeouts, he bestows on him "The James Baldwin Memorial Award for Best Candidate for a Second-Half Collapse."

 

"Would you say Garland is another James Baldwin or another Tommy John?" Simmons asks. "I'm leaning toward another Baldwin."

 

:fyou Richard Simmons!

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QUOTE(Southside hitmen @ Jul 11, 2005 -> 09:32 PM)
The White Sox reached the All-Star break with a nine-game lead in the AL Central, but the doubters are still out there. Count ESPN.com columnist Bill Simmons among them.

 

In his midseason look at the AL, he gives the South Siders a couple of dubious awards. First is "The Napoleon Dynamite Award for Most Inexplicable Success Story."

 

 

"How are the White Sox headed for 112 wins right now?" Simmons writes. "Really, 112 wins? Does that seem reasonable for a team with nobody hitting above .280 and Dustin Hermanson as their closer?"

 

Simmons also picks on right-hander Jon Garland. Noting that Garland is on pace for 25 wins but only 110 strikeouts, he bestows on him "The James Baldwin Memorial Award for Best Candidate for a Second-Half Collapse."

 

"Would you say Garland is another James Baldwin or another Tommy John?" Simmons asks. "I'm leaning toward another Baldwin."

I really don't care about getting any love from ESPN but even after what we've done we still don't get the benefit of the doubt. This is pretty bad, this guy has no f***ing clue, as long as Carrie Wood K's 300 and loses 15 with a 4.50 hes still 10 times better than Garland, according to him.

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First off, I'm a big fan of Simmons' stuff, he's hilarious a lot of the time. Hell, even though I don't neccessarily agree with these dubious honors, the fact that he came up with them is pretty funny.

 

For the Napolean Dynamite one, nobody expected the Sox to be where they are, so what are we?? A surprise. Furthermore in today's game most great teams have a couple great players and role players around them, whereas we have a lot of good players, but no megastars. it really sort of is an inexplicable success. nobody figured we could win and we are.

 

Then for the Garland thing, it's hard to blame the guy, Garland has been a mediocre starter for what, four seasons? All of a sudden he has a good half season. I think he's figured his stuff out and won't collapse, but I can't blame somebody for taking the "I'll believe it when I see it" approach.

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QUOTE(Sox Hustler @ Jul 12, 2005 -> 03:41 AM)
I really don't care about getting any love from ESPN but even after what we've done we still don't get the benefit of the doubt. This is pretty bad, this guy has no f***ing clue, as long as Carrie Wood K's 300 and loses 15 with a 4.50 hes still 10 times better than Garland, according to him.

 

The guy is a writer for ESPN Page 2, supposed to combine humor and sports. he's not a straight up baseball analyst. Almost all of his articles are only half serious anyhow.

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I think the other side of the Garland coin is that it's hard to believe a guy can go from being a 12 win pitcher to a 12 win A HALF pitcher so fast, unless you've actually seen what he's been doing.

 

We've watched Jon out there just flat out beat people. We've seen him throw out quality start after quality start. We saw him ace Tejada when he needed to. We've seen him go out and just beat people using sinkers and ground balls.

 

Unless you've watched what Jon has done this year, it's hard to believe. The numbers wouldn't seem to add up, unless you know what kind of pitcher he has been.

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By the way with all the non love we get from national sports stations and writers, did anybody see during the home run derby when they put the camera on the white sox 4 guys and they were all sitting together away from the other people. Just made me think about the "We dont care" thing with buehrle, garland, pods, and paulie, sitting together by themselves.

Edited by Sonik22
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Simmons is yet another ESPN guy who roots for either BoSox or NYY. His opinion on this matter means nothing to me.

 

That aside, I look forward to reading his article in ESPN mag every week. Usually some funny stuff. My favorite was the time he talked about dorm sports that guys make up.

 

Worst thing in ESPN mag? Gotta be either Stu Scott's 2way (pointless) or DPatrick's smugfest.

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QUOTE(Sonik22 @ Jul 11, 2005 -> 09:52 PM)
By the way with all the non love we get from national sports stations and writers, did anybody see during the home run derby when they put the camera on the white sox 4 guys and they were all sitting together away from the other people.  Just made me think about the "We dont care" thing with buehrle, garland, pods, and paulie, sitting together by themselves.

I didn't see that, thats pretty cool though.

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QUOTE(Southside hitmen @ Jul 11, 2005 -> 09:32 PM)
"How are the White Sox headed for 112 wins right now?" Simmons writes. "Really, 112 wins? Does that seem reasonable for a team with nobody hitting above .280 and Dustin Hermanson as their closer?"

 

 

Scotty is hitting .294...hmmm

 

The "Rob Neyer School of Research"

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QUOTE(UofIChiSox @ Jul 11, 2005 -> 10:43 PM)
First off, I'm a big fan of Simmons' stuff, he's hilarious a lot of the time.  Hell, even though I don't neccessarily agree with these dubious honors, the fact that he came up with them is pretty funny. 

 

For the Napolean Dynamite one, nobody expected the Sox to be where they are, so what are we??  A surprise.  Furthermore in today's game most great teams have a couple great players and role players around them, whereas we have a lot of good players, but no megastars.  it really sort of is an inexplicable success.  nobody figured we could win and we are.

 

Then for the Garland thing, it's hard to blame the guy, Garland has been a mediocre starter for what, four seasons?  All of a sudden he has a good half season.  I think he's figured his stuff out and won't collapse, but I can't blame somebody for taking the "I'll believe it when I see it" approach.

 

Don't ever take sides against the family again!

 

 

 

Edited by tonyho7476
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Did anyone actually READ the article or did they just notice the White Sox stuff? The guy is a comedy writer, nothing else. He's not working for ESPN because he's a statistician, he's there for humor. You guys take this stuff too literally.

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QUOTE(bschmaranz @ Jul 12, 2005 -> 02:10 PM)
Did anyone actually READ the article or did they just notice the White Sox stuff?  The guy is a comedy writer, nothing else.  He's not working for ESPN because he's a statistician, he's there for humor.  You guys take this stuff too literally.

 

I did, that's why I was trying to defend him. He even ADMITS to Being a Red Sox fan, only watching the American League. Hell, we haven't played the Red Sox so he's probably NEVER EVEN SEEN US PLAY. Those should be enough red flags for you to figure out that this isn't a serious baseball analysis article. He probably looked at some stats, looked at the standings and bam, wrote up some comedy.

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Bill Simmons a.k.a. "The Sports Guy" shouldn't get a beating from me or any other White Sox fan. He is a Boston guy and he knows what it's like to not win a title in 80+ years. Not to mention his Page 2 articles on ESPN are clearly the best Sports/Pop Culture journalism around. If you haven't read him before, start, he is terrific.

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QUOTE(Middle Buffalo @ Jul 11, 2005 -> 10:52 PM)
Simmons is yet another ESPN guy who roots for either BoSox or  NYY.  His opinion on this matter means nothing to me.

I'm a fan of Bill Simmons. He's a sports/humor/pop culture columnist, and he rarely does serious baseball analysis. His columns on Vegas and on sports gambling are great reads.

 

I don't think he's being unfair. I don't think anyone, even the most die-hard ChiSox fan among us, would have seriously predicted us to be this far in front of the league. And as for Garland, well, Simmons is basing his thoughts on Garland's career up to this season. While I hope Garland proves him (and most of the rest of the nation) wrong, Garland needs to keep proving himself this year. He has to prove that he's figured it out, and that he's a top-flight pitcher. I think he will.

 

One thing, though. He originally started out as the Boston Sports Guy. He wouldn't be caught dead rooting for the Yankees.

 

:gosox3: :gosox4: :gosox2:

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QUOTE(Middle Buffalo @ Jul 11, 2005 -> 09:52 PM)
Simmons is yet another ESPN guy who roots for either BoSox or  NYY.  His opinion on this matter means nothing to me.

 

He's from Boston, and hates the Yanks. My favorite part of the Mag. Even though I dont agree with him, its still kinda funny about the James Baldwin award...

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I'm not worried about the Garland comment. the only reason everyone is saying he won't keep pitching like this is because the past few years he hasn't pitched nearly as good as this. but the thing is, he isn't walking anyone. he's walking half as many batters than any of his previous years, so it just shows that these people really aren't looking into the reason he's been successful.

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