Check this out. Hilarious

[JoshPR]

http://www.rotoauthority.com/

 

 

Rnk     Player                Prediction             Comment 

 1     Roger Clemens      Astros       Rocket tops this list, but he'll probably only 
play for Astros. Yankees remain a long shot. 

 2   Daisuke Matsuzaka  Mariners    Could be the best available starter if posted. 
Expect a Nomo-like rookie season. 

 3     Paul Konerko        White Sox   Beloved "Paulie" has two good years left but 
will get a crippling 4-yr deal with ChiSox. 

4      A.J. Burnett          Nationals    Said he would "absolutely" consider Nationals;  more likely he will consider the biggest offer. 

5      Rafael Furcal        Cubs         Nomar experiment worth a shot, but Baker 
clamoring for reliable top-of-the-order SS. 

6     Kevin Millwood      Orioles       O's can afford to make a splash with Sosa 
and Palmeiro off the books. 

7      Billy Wagner        Phillies       New Phillies management plans on securing  
yet another paralyzing long-term deal. 

8      B.J. Ryan            Yankees    After being burned by Pavano and Wright, NY 
will try to craft a dominant bullpen. 

9     Hideki Matsui        Yankees    Yanks have a three-year, $35MM offer ready. 
Yankee inflation I guess. 

10     Brian Giles           Cubs        An upgrade from Jeromy Burnitz will be 
required to placate Cubs fans. 

11   Johnny Damon      Red Sox     He'll stay with the Red Sox on an 
ill-advised, four-year deal. 

12   Nomar Garciaparra  Marlins     Like Ivan Rodriguez, Nomar 
will have a resurgence with a 1-year deal. 

13 Ramon Hernandez Mets Mike Jacobs would suffice, but Mets will go 
for the known quantity.  Might take four years. 
14 Paul Byrd Royals KC actually has a few bucks to spend, so  
bringing back the solid Byrd makes sense. 
15 Kenji Jojima Mariners Probably a notch above Bengie Molina, the 
Japanese star could be a bargain. 
16 Tom Gordon  Mets He'll jump across town for a chance to close. 


17 Jeff Weaver Angels A three-year deal might be long enough to let  
Jeff team up with brother Jered in the rotation. 
18 Jarrod Washburn Brewers He's from Wisconsin, and would give the 
Brewers a nice series of decent lefty starters. 
19 Trevor Hoffman D'Backs Jose Valverde's entirely capable, but 
Arizona will want a new, shiny Closer. 
20 Bengie Molina Padres Someone has to replace Ramon Hernandez, 
and Molina should cost less. 
21 Reggie Sanders Nationals The Nationals need an outfielder, and Sanders 
could be lured away from St. Louis. 
22 Matt Lawton  A's OBP guy whose stock fell after being traded 
twice; Beane's type of player. 
23 Mike Piazza A's Could split catching and DH duties; 
has a little gas left in the tank. 
24 Matt Morris Dodgers Probable 3-yr deal won't end well; someone 
will have to replace Weaver. 
25 Kenny Rogers Braves In Farnsworth, Drew, and Sheffield, Braves 
have been willing to reform bad boys. 

26 Erubiel Durazo Red Sox A great sleeper for 2006 after a lost '05. 
Durazo is definitely Epstein's type. 
27 Todd Jones Yankees This contract will probably end up ugly. 
Jones will not have an ERA near 2 again. 
28 Bob Howry Cubs Price should be somewhat steep after two 
stellar seasons. 
29 Kyle Farnsworth Orioles Plenty of options available for the O's  
to replace Ryan; good every other year. 
30 Octavio Dotel Red Sox With Durazo, the other great FA bargain.  
Could be ready by spring training. 
31 Bob Wickman Indians He'll take a home-town discount to close for 
one more year. 
32 Mark Grudzielanek Cardinals The Cards will want him back; there just aren't 
a lot of 2B options out there. 
33 Tony Graffanino Red Sox Unknown whether he can maintain the high 
OBP; should stay in Boston for cheap. 
34 Scott Eyre Yankees Will be hard-pressed to duplicate 2005; 
more than a one-year deal would be trouble. 
35 Joe Randa Twins The prototypical average 3B, just like 
the Twins like it. 
36 Mike Timlin Red Sox Should help solidify a much-improved Boston 
bullpen. 
37 Kenny Lofton Cubs Baker favorite would give the Cubs needed 
OBP from leadoff spot at a reasonable price. 
38 Juan Encarnacion Orioles Baltimore clearly needs a halfway decent 
outfielder, so he fits the bill. 
39 Rudy Seanez Cubs If Hendry is serious about the 2006 Cubs, 
Seanez would make their bullpen fantastic. 
40 Bill Mueller Brewers No great 3B options in Milwaukee; would be a 
smart addition. 
41 Jason Johnson Pirates Veteran to be traded for prospects at 
deadline. 
42 Jose Cruz Jr. Pirates See above. 


43 Ugueth Urbina Padres As Hoffman's replacement, shouldn't be a 
whole lot worse. 
44 Preston Wilson Giants The Giants love low-OBP guys like Wilson. 

45 Mark Sweeney Cubs Needed to bolster a terrible bench. 
No more Macias! 
46 Rondell White  Cardinals Old hurt guy to join other old, hurt St. Louis 
outfielders. 
47 Brad Ausmus Houston For some reason, the Astros just keep 
bringing him back. 
48 Roberto Hernandez Giants The 40 year-old will flop in his return to 
San Fran. 
49 Julian Tavarez Cardinals A Cardinal mainstay. 


50 Kevin Brown White Sox Fits White Sox bad boy image, will either be 
really, really bad or a nice surprise

Edited October 16, 2005 by JoshPR

[mac9001]

I guess he just pulled that last one out of his ass...

[Greg The Bull Luzinski]

The author of these predictions should really lay off the crack.

[sayitaintso]

Kevin Brown here?

[Felix]

Kevin Brown? This guy needs to get real.

[rangercal]

BJ Ryan will command too much money (even for the yankees) to just be used for middle relief. He will get a closer job some where.

[fathom]

Actually, I think the predictions seem to be pretty solid.

[rangercal]

Kevin Brown?

 

LMAO

 

I'll take Jose-mark-Jon-Freddy-Brandon

 

duke-LR/#6

[Rowand44]

Actually, I think the predictions seem to be pretty solid.

You know there is absolutely no chance that the cubs land Giles and Furcal, NO WAY. I think Damon ends up with the skanks, I'm hoping he's right about Pauly though.

 

EDIT: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, didn't even notice the Brown prediction.

Edited October 16, 2005 by Rowand44

[fathom]

You know there is absolutely no chance that the cubs land Giles and Furcal, NO WAY.  I think Damon ends up with the skanks, I'm hoping he's right about Pauly though.

 

EDIT: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, didn't even notice the Brown prediction.

 

I think the Cubs have an outstanding chance of getting Giles and Furcal. They're going to have a lot of money free to spend, and they already have most of the expensive positions set. Furcal has long been rumored to be the main priority for the Cubs, and I know they've been interested in Giles for a while. The one thing I remember about Giles is that he didn't want to play in the Midwest when he was rumored to be traded by the Pirates.

[Rowand44]

I think the Cubs have an outstanding chance of getting Giles and Furcal.  They're going to have a lot of money free to spend, and they already have most of the expensive positions set.  Furcal has long been rumored to be the main priority for the Cubs, and I know they've been interested in Giles for a while.  The one thing I remember about Giles is that he didn't want to play in the Midwest when he was rumored to be traded by the Pirates.

I'll guarantee you that they don't land both, they definitely have a good shot at Furcal but Giles will remain in San Diego or go to St. Louis IMO.

[Steve9347]

i'd rather have Helen Keller than Kevin Brown.

[JUGGERNAUT]

I saw K Brown & said Huh? We already have 6 capable starters signed for next year why would we be interested in Brown? Unless we are trading 2 out of the 6 that's insanely crazy!

 

Up until then I was thinking .. not too bad of a list .. but he's selling Kong way short. I wonder if his list was made prior to the ChiSox winning 8 straight on the road.

[BlackBetsy]

The author of these predictions should really lay off the crack.

I actually wound up agreeing with about 90% of them, but:

 

Giles to the Cubs? No way.

Garciaparra to the Marlins? No way.

Byrd to the Royals? No way.

Piazza to the A's? No way.

 

Among others, I can definitely see the Cubs going after Furcal, Yankees after BJ Ryan, Lawton going to the A's, and Randa to the Twins. I'd also put in LeCroy to the Twins.

 

And Kevin Brown has pitched his last game. I'm not sure (1) he wants to pitch any more; and (2) he has anything left in the tank, anyway.

 

Piazza is an interesting case. I think after playing his career in pitcher's parks, he deserves to go someplace that is more hitter friendly. I think he would fit in well in Arizona, or even in Philadelphia. Heck, Colorado if he could stand the losing. He could also trade leagues and DH/C for the Angels, Orioles, or the Rangers.

[Kalapse]

I don't think people know that Konerko is only 29, mainly because he runs like a 40 year old. No way in hell does he only have 2 years left in him, he's settleing into his prime right now.

 

And when did the White Sox become "Bad Boys"?

[Rowand44]

I don't think people know that Konerko is only 29, mainly because he runs like a 40 year old. No way in hell does he only have 2 years left in him, he's settleing into his prime right now.

 

And when did the White Sox become "Bad Boys"?

I guess cause we have aj we're bad boys now?

[Heads22]

I don't think people know that Konerko is only 29, mainly because he runs like a 40 year old. No way in hell does he only have 2 years left in him, he's settleing into his prime right now.

 

 

 

The "degenerative hip condition"?

[NUKE_CLEVELAND]

I guess he just pulled that last one out of his ass...

 

 

I was gonna say. What the hell do we need Kevin Brown for anyway?

[Rowand44]

  What the hell do we need Kevin Brown for anyway?

Take up dl space.

[WilliamTell]

This was my favorite one.

 

41 Jason Johnson Pirates Veteran to be traded for prospects at

deadline.

42 Jose Cruz Jr. Pirates See above.

[nitetrain8601]

I don't think the Kevin Brown thing will happen(I see him retiring actually) but most of his stuff makes sense.

[ChWRoCk2]

id say he did a decent job except for the fact that alot of players are goin to the cubs, kind of ridiculous if u ask me