witesoxfan Posted June 3, 2003 Share Posted June 3, 2003 The Sox are too f***ing boring...and I want some good jokes to read. If you have any....just post them. I'll start it off. A guy and his family decide to go on vacation. After he and his wife considered all the spots to go to, they decide to go to Jamaica. After their plane lands in Jamaica from Florida, There, they get off the plane and go to their hotel room. After a while, the husband gets bored as hell, and drags his wife out to a bar. They start having some fun, and are drinking a s***load, and the husband has to go to the bathroom. There, he sees a big, meanass native Jamaican. He walks over to the stall next to the Jamaicans, unzips his zipper, and takes a piss. While pissing, the husband looks over and the Jamaican says "You got a problem?" The husband tells him that he was just comparing sizes and noticed that he had a tattoo, something the husband also had on his penis. The Jamaican said "What does your's say?" "It says 'Me' when unerected, but my name, 'Mike Stife' when I'm at full length." The husband, feeling quite proud of his good sized schlong, sticks his chest out with pride. The Jamaican laughs. "What's so damn funny?" the American says. "Your's only says 'We.'" "Of course it only says 'We' when I'm not hard, dumbf***." He then gets a boner, and it extends all the way. The American stands in awe. The Jamaican reads it aloud. "Welcome to Jamaica. Have a nice time." I got another too Two guys, we'll call them Jim and Ted, meet up in heaven, and they start talking about things. As they get to talking, Ted brings up how they died. Jim says "I froze to death." Ted says how sorry he is for his death. Jim then asks Ted how he died. "Well, I knew my wife had been cheating on me for some time. So one day, I came home from work early. I bolted into our house, looked upstairs to find my wife in our bed naked. So I searched the whole upstairs - nothing. I searched the whole main level - nothing. I searched the whole basement - nothing. I then ran back upstairs, into the attic and I found nothing. I was so sure I would find him, and then to not find him, I though I could die; and I did, of a heart attack." Jim then says "Well you should have looked in the freezer. Then we'd both still be alive!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 3, 2003 Share Posted June 3, 2003 I know a very funny joke. The Chicago White sox. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GASHWOUND Posted June 3, 2003 Share Posted June 3, 2003 I know a very funny joke. The Chicago White sox. And I know another....Bmr Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 3, 2003 Share Posted June 3, 2003 And I know another....Bmr lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LowerCaseRepublican Posted June 3, 2003 Share Posted June 3, 2003 Kobe Bryant, the Pope, a young boy and George W. Bush are on an airplane that is about to crash, but they only have 3 parachutes. Kobe grabs one and says "I am one of the greatest basketball players and people are going to want me alive." So he takes the parachute and jumps out. George W. Bush gets up and declares "I'm the leader of the free world. People need me." So he grabs a parachute and jumps out. So they're down to one last parachute and the young boy and Pope are left. The Pope kneels down and tells the child, "I have lived a long, full life so you should take the parachute." The child looks at the Pope and says "Thanks, but you can have one too. That idiot Bush grabbed my bookbag." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southsider2k5 Posted June 3, 2003 Share Posted June 3, 2003 One of my personal fav's. Five Chicago sports fans were climbing a mountain one day. Each was a fan of a different Chicago team, and each proclaimed to be the most loyal of all fans to their team. As they climbed higher, they argued as to which one of them was the most loyal of all. They continued to argue all the way up the mountain, and finally as they reached the top, the Blackhawk fan hurled himself off the mountain, "This is for the Hawks!", as he fell to his doom. Not wanting to be outdone, the Bulls fan threw thimself off the mountain, proclaiming, "This is for the greatest team of the 90's!" Seeing this, the Bears fan walked over and shouted, "This is for DA CoACH!", and leapt to his death. The two remaining fans just looked at each other in stunned silence. After a minute, the Sox Fan shouted, "This is for everyone on the south Side!", and pushed the Cubs fan off of the mountain Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Be Good Posted June 3, 2003 Share Posted June 3, 2003 The cop pulled someone over with a lot of ducks. The cop says ¡§ sir why do you have all those ducks¡¨. The guy said well I need your suggestion on what to do with them. The cop says ¡§take them to the zoo¡¨. The guy agrees so the next day he pulls the same guy over and says ¡§sir I thought I told you to take those ducks to the zoo¡¨. The guys says ¡§yeah we did go and we liked it today were going to the beach¡¨. try to BE GOOD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Be Good Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 WELL did anyone like my joke?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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