Steff Posted June 16, 2003 Share Posted June 16, 2003 Quit whining, I won't feel sorry for you since you 1) had your fun and 2) came out on top in the end. Move on, B, you won. From her? I did months ago. From the bulls***? DOnt have much choice if she keeps causing me problems. I do have a bit of sympathy in this situation for you. While Jim and I were building our house there were definitely some stressful times and no matter how hard you try things do carry over into work. We worked extra hard on not letting it effect us, but sometimes it was hard. There's a lot of stress in relationships anyway. So working together only intensifies it. But heck.. before Jim relationships with people I didn't work with were hard. And saying just ignore her doesn't work either. It's something you'll have to deal with on an ongoing basis. My advice would be to try to salvage some sort of friendship and do your best to keep it that way. Be the bigger person. A little compromise in these situations goes a long way. IMO. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrandoFan Posted June 16, 2003 Share Posted June 16, 2003 And saying just ignore her doesn't work either. It's something you'll have to deal with on an ongoing basis. My advice would be to try to salvage some sort of friendship and do your best to keep it that way. Be the bigger person. A little compromise in these situations goes a long way. IMO. Bri already said she was a volatile psycho bipolar b**** from Hell (which was part of her appeal, right?).....No compromise, the situation is not salvageable- she will walk all over him if he shows "bigger person" weakness....Plus he won anyway by not losing and by actually learning from mistakes, he'll be fine. (And you know I am usually very PC and fair when it comes to women...) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steff Posted June 16, 2003 Share Posted June 16, 2003 Bri already said she was a volatile psycho bipolar b**** from Hell (which was part of her appeal, right?).....No compromise, the situation is not salvageable- she will walk all over him if he shows "bigger person" weakness....Plus he won anyway by not losing and by actually learning from mistakes, he'll be fine. (And you know I am usually very PC and fair when it comes to women...) There are ways to deal with everyone. As someone who dated a volitile psychopathic hothead for 2 years, trust me I know this. And if things are as bad as he says they are he should be running to his bosses to cut her off at the pass. Bite the bullet. Admit to whatever has happened, and get it on record that she is possibly blackmailing him. There are many workplace laws that can actually work FOR him even if he did something questionable. Did she participate in the emails? Did she instigate some hostile words? Likely all of this is documented, and that he hasn't lost his job yet (because you know the bosses already know) speaks volumes for his value at the company, IMO. If it were me, and even if I was somewhat at fault, I would fine a complaint, or at least make my boss aware of the situation. That way, if they DO terminate you and not her (since she was part of the BS), you have something to fall back on (i.e.. sue them for discrimination). I know I'm going to the extreme here, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrandoFan Posted June 16, 2003 Share Posted June 16, 2003 As someone who dated a volitile psychopathic hothead for 2 years, trust me I know this. Gee...who could that be? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrandoFan Posted June 16, 2003 Share Posted June 16, 2003 There are many workplace laws that can actually work FOR him even if he did something questionable. Did she participate in the emails? Did she instigate some hostile words That's what I told him LLLLOOOONNGGGG time ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 16, 2003 Author Share Posted June 16, 2003 Quit whining, I won't feel sorry for you since you 1) had your fun and 2) came out on top in the end. Move on, B, you won. From her? I did months ago. From the bulls***? DOnt have much choice if she keeps causing me problems. I do have a bit of sympathy in this situation for you. While Jim and I were building our house there were definitely some stressful times and no matter how hard you try things do carry over into work. We worked extra hard on not letting it effect us, but sometimes it was hard. There's a lot of stress in relationships anyway. So working together only intensifies it. But heck.. before Jim relationships with people I didn't work with were hard. And saying just ignore her doesn't work either. It's something you'll have to deal with on an ongoing basis. My advice would be to try to salvage some sort of friendship and do your best to keep it that way. Be the bigger person. A little compromise in these situations goes a long way. IMO. I did that. I thought everything was fine. All of a sudden....you know the rest. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 16, 2003 Author Share Posted June 16, 2003 That's what I told him LLLLOOOONNGGGG time ago. Im her boss. I have nothing working for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steff Posted June 16, 2003 Share Posted June 16, 2003 That's what I told him LLLLOOOONNGGGG time ago. Im her boss. I have nothing working for me. How long have you been her boss? All along? Did you use your position to "get stuff" from her? I have a bazillion questions because I think I can help you out - Jim and I went through something similar - but I have to get out of here. Got a dinner with my boyfriend Carlton to get to. Talk to you guys tomorrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 16, 2003 Author Share Posted June 16, 2003 That's what I told him LLLLOOOONNGGGG time ago. Im her boss. I have nothing working for me. How long have you been her boss? All along? Did you use your position to "get stuff" from her? I have a bazillion questions because I think I can help you out - Jim and I went through something similar - but I have to get out of here. Got a dinner with my boyfriend Carlton to get to. Talk to you guys tomorrow. Nope i never abused the situation at all. I just wanted her to quit. I never forced or tried to force her. THe relationship started with her contacting me. She made the first move with the kiss, and all along i told her i didnt think we should see eachother until she quits. When she didnt quit, and was doing weird s*** with other guys, i broke it off. However we remained friend and in contact. It got ugly when she started dating someone i was told stole from us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedPinStripes Posted June 16, 2003 Share Posted June 16, 2003 ah unemployment isn't so bad. you wake whenever you want, stay out as late as you want, you have plenty of free time, with no job to get in the way of plans, and you can rediscover the wealth of quality daytime programming. alright maybe that last one isn't so great. Sounds great except where's the money going to come from ? Sorry to hear about that Bmr. Talk to MauryPinStripes. He can give you pointer's on the finer side of unemployment :fyou killa. Unemployment sucks unless you have NO bills what so ever. I was out of work for 7 months. toughest time of my life. I never want to go through that s*** again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 16, 2003 Author Share Posted June 16, 2003 ah unemployment isn't so bad. you wake whenever you want, stay out as late as you want, you have plenty of free time, with no job to get in the way of plans, and you can rediscover the wealth of quality daytime programming. alright maybe that last one isn't so great. Sounds great except where's the money going to come from ? Sorry to hear about that Bmr. Talk to MauryPinStripes. He can give you pointer's on the finer side of unemployment :fyou killa. Unemployment sucks unless you have NO bills what so ever. I was out of work for 7 months. toughest time of my life. I never want to go through that s*** again. I was out of work for 3 months once. I dont know about you, but i get a lot of my self esteem from my job. When i had no job, i felt like a complete loser. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soxplosion Posted June 17, 2003 Share Posted June 17, 2003 Actually Im a very moral person. I just let out my true insanity on the internet... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted June 17, 2003 Share Posted June 17, 2003 (Roman, too bad you haven't needed to update your sig in a couple days.) I use to get pissed when people would tell me "everything happens for a reason" I use to think the reason was life just enjoyed f***ing with me. Now I realize those times were where I grew the most. It isn't as much what you achieve in life but what you overcome that really defines your life. Take this as a challenge and make the most of it. When you are really successful figure out how to really f*** with her because revenge, like beer, is best served cold. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 17, 2003 Author Share Posted June 17, 2003 (Roman, too bad you haven't needed to update your sig in a couple days.) I use to get pissed when people would tell me "everything happens for a reason" I use to think the reason was life just enjoyed f***ing with me. Now I realize those times were where I grew the most. It isn't as much what you achieve in life but what you overcome that really defines your life. Take this as a challenge and make the most of it. When you are really successful figure out how to really f*** with her because revenge, like beer, is best served cold. Thanks man. I appreciate yours and everyone else's support and encouragement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted June 17, 2003 Share Posted June 17, 2003 It's a small world. The best jobs aren't advertised. You never know who knows someone who is hiring for what could be your dream job. BTW it's another good reason to always be respectful online. Good luck in your search. Have you thought about starting your own business? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 17, 2003 Author Share Posted June 17, 2003 It's a small world. The best jobs aren't advertised. You never know who knows someone who is hiring for what could be your dream job. BTW it's another good reason to always be respectful online. Good luck in your search. Have you thought about starting your own business? I wasnt fired. At least not yet? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted June 17, 2003 Share Posted June 17, 2003 It's a small world. The best jobs aren't advertised. You never know who knows someone who is hiring for what could be your dream job. BTW it's another good reason to always be respectful online. Good luck in your search. Have you thought about starting your own business? I wasnt fired. At least not yet? Oops sorry. Hope I didn't jinx you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 17, 2003 Author Share Posted June 17, 2003 It's a small world. The best jobs aren't advertised. You never know who knows someone who is hiring for what could be your dream job. BTW it's another good reason to always be respectful online. Good luck in your search. Have you thought about starting your own business? I wasnt fired. At least not yet? Oops sorry. Hope I didn't jinx you. Nah i hope not lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 20, 2003 Author Share Posted June 20, 2003 Got fired. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SI1020 Posted June 20, 2003 Share Posted June 20, 2003 Got fired. After the initial shock wears off don't allow your life to talespin. Relax, take a deep breath, go out and have an ass kicking good time and then plot your future moves. Do NOT let negativity, anger, self pity, etc set on. I can't impress this enough. Lastly remember, it happens at least once to just about everybody. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 20, 2003 Author Share Posted June 20, 2003 After the initial shock wears off don't allow your life to talespin. Relax, take a deep breath, go out and have an ass kicking good time and then plot your future moves. Do NOT let negativity, anger, self pity, etc set on. I can't impress this enough. Lastly remember, it happens at least once to just about everybody. Yeah i know. thanks. Actually, they allowed me to resign. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted June 20, 2003 Share Posted June 20, 2003 Got fired. Damn. When I saw this bumped to the top I was hoping for the best. Good Luck. I know several friends who used their unemployment time to start their own businesses. Not exactly legit with the unemployment people but something to think about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted June 20, 2003 Share Posted June 20, 2003 Yeah i know. thanks. Actually, they allowed me to resign. NO! By resigning you may have hurt your chances for unemployment, etc. Check with an attorney regardless about your situation. Did you negotiate an severance, etc. Health insurance continuation, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 20, 2003 Author Share Posted June 20, 2003 Damn. When I saw this bumped to the top I was hoping for the best. Good Luck. I know several friends who used their unemployment time to start their own businesses. Not exactly legit with the unemployment people but something to think about. Well one thing i know for sure, Im getting out of this town. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bmr31 Posted June 20, 2003 Author Share Posted June 20, 2003 NO! By resigning you may have hurt your chances for unemployment, etc. Check with an attorney regardless about your situation. Did you negotiate an severance, etc. Health insurance continuation, etc. Dude 250 bucks a week isnt gonna do anything anyways. Ill check into it though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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