dog crashes car!

[EvilMonkey]

http://www.boston.com/news/odd/articles/20...?p1=MEWell_Pos1

 

 

Woman crashes when teaching dog to drive

August 28, 2006

 

BEIJING --A woman in Hohhot, the capital of north China's Inner Mongolia region, crashed her car while giving her dog a driving lesson, the official Xinhua News Agency said Monday.

 

The woman, identified only be her surname, Li, said her dog "was fond of crouching on the steering wheel and often watched her drive," according to Xinhua.

 

"She thought she would let the dog 'have a try' while she operated the accelerator and brake," the report said. "They did not make it far before crashing into an oncoming car."

 

Xinhua did not say what kind of dog or vehicles were involved but Li paid for repairs.

 

Top Ten Excuses Offered By Dog For Crashing Car

 

10. "I could swear that oncoming sedan looked like a large, metallic squirrel."

 

9. "I thought vehicles had the power of dematerialization, like in those fascinating Chuck Wagon commercials."

 

8. "Everything was going fine until I realized it had been three minutes since I licked my balls."

 

7. "It wasn't my fault. The other driver was Chinese. 'Nuff said."

 

6. "You know that whole 'faking the throw' thing? Yeah, yeah. That's funny. Really funny. Oh, my ribs are aching. You know what else is funny? Head-on collisions, b****."

 

5. "Two words: Cell phone. My best friend was just telling me about this ratty old gym sneaker she was gnawing on that just sounded so to die for and I guess I just got caught up in the moment."

 

4. "I was having a stressful day at the office, putting the finishing touches on a proposed merger between my snout and the mailman's genitals."

 

3. "Honestly, my Blood-Snausage-Ratio was no higher than .08."

 

2. "Gotta admit... I looked pretty damn cool for about three-quarters of a second there."

 

...and the number one excuse offered by the dog for crashing the car...

 

1. "I'm very sad about all of this, but can I say one thing in my defense? I'm a f***ing dog, moron."

 

(I stole the list. Sorry, not that creative!)

[DrunkBomber]

Dont they eat dogs on China?

[jackie hayes]

Dont they eat dogs on China?

No, dog's kind of a bbq thing. They stick with the Dixies for that.

[DrunkBomber]

No, dog's kind of a bbq thing. They stick with the Dixies for that.

Im pretty sure I saw dog on a menu in a chinese restaurant.

[GoodAsGould]

Im pretty sure I saw dog on a menu in a chinese restaurant.

 

I recently went to China and didnt see dog on any of the menus.... Not to say they dont serve it but for the 2 weeks I was there I never saw it once.

[SoxAce]

Dont they eat dogs on China?

 

No, but we eat them in America..

[Iwritecode]

Dont they eat dogs on China?

 

I believe that's Koreans.

Edited August 29, 2006 by Iwritecode

[Texsox]

The practice is illegal in most countries, although it seems strange any society would offer more protection to a dog than say a cow or pig. I'm not certain why Asians have become the brunt of these jokes. It could be that with the meat cut up it would seem easy to substitute one type of meat for another.

 

http://www.snopes.com/horrors/food/chinese.htm

http://www.snopes.com/critters/edibles/tourist.htm

[southsideirish71]

Dogs are so behind cats these days.

 

Edited August 29, 2006 by southsideirish71

[jackie hayes]

Iirc, on Brandmeier's short-lived tv show, he took the most lovable-looking dog around to Asian restaurants (Korean or Chinese, I can't remember), asking them if they'd be willing to cook it up for him.