Tips or advice for this dating situation...

[mreye]

Children who live in that type of a household will always rebel at one point or another, its up to the kids psyche to how bad of a rebellion. There is a happy medium between leave alone parenting and nazi parenting, neither one is a good choice.

 

Sure, but I'm going on my assumption, correct or not, that her life isn't really run like a concentration camp and that it's only one 20 year old's opinion.

 

Ugh, if I have a daughter im going to forbid her from dating until she is 21

 

I have three and they're not dating until I'm dead!!

[southsider2k5]

Nice call. I dont have too many problems finding ladies, but its the uncontrollable drama that I have trouble with.

 

You do have some control over the drama to some extent... You always have the ability to walk away at this stage.

[RibbieRubarb]

By the way I do allow my daughter to go out most weekends, she even stays away occasionaly, but only because she socialises with a large group of her peers and I know them all.

 

But then again you are in England and all she does is go to Tea parties and Fox hunts, right?

[southsideirish71]

Congrats Mike!!!!

 

We also are baking this year!!!

 

Here's to our sperm!!!

 

Congrats to everyone baking(Ribbie, Mike, Steff and whoever else is baking). Our bun was done 2 months ago. Mrs SSI71 and I are going to close the bakery now.

[Wedge]

Join the seminary

[southsider2k5]

Congrats to everyone baking(Ribbie, Mike, Steff and whoever else is baking). Our bun was done 2 months ago. Mrs SSI71 and I are going to close the bakery now.

 

That will be us after this one. Two buns and out.

 

BTW, a belated congrats on the delivery

[WhiteSoxFan1]

Please don't take this the wrong way, but as my daughter is 17 next month, you are the personification of my worst nightmare. I am sure your a realy nice guy at heart but you are a guy, a 20 year old guy and if you are anything like I was at 20 I wouldn't want you within shouting distance of my daughter.

 

I believe your just setting your self up for at best, a whole lot of frustration and at worst frustration and an empty wallet. If she is anything like the majority of 17 year olds she will be far less mature than you in most ways and in the long run will probably end up siding with her parents, who believe it or not are imposing what seem from the outside at least, draconian restrictions, on her socialising because they love her, want only the best for her and feel that their way is the right way. There is no way on this earth that a hormone driven lad about town is going to change their minds, no matter how often he mows the lawn.

Move on, find someone nearer your own age, there are plenty others out there.

 

By the way I do allow my daughter to go out most weekends, she even stays away occasionaly, but only because she socialises with a large group of her peers and I know them all.

 

Understood.

 

I am starting to better understand whats going on with her parents , but all I can really do is know that in my heart I have good intentions. Im not someone who would ever use someone just for sex (at least without them knowing) or someone who would ever cheat. Id be willing to have a commited relationship, and treat her the way I believe women should be treated. That said, Ithink I have problems when it comes to attachment. IM not clingy and im not in anyway forceful because I keep it to myself, but I tend to fall head over heels for someone pretty easily and get easily anxious. I know theres plenty of fish in the sea, but I always seem to concentrate on one at a time. Then they get most of my attention.

 

A few thoughts:

 

The drama with women NEVER ends.

 

If you continue to try to see this girl, it will be YOU who is creating the drama.

 

I don't know you or much about this situation so I could be wrong, but I think there is more going on here. I think the real issue is that you don't like being told what you can and can't do. So it's become a little bit of a battle with her parents. It's not really about the girl. How am I doing?

 

I do have a little bit of an italian temper of not liking being told what to do, but its really not as bad as it probably sounds. Sure I dont like the fact that me and her both want to hang out and still have trouble doing so, but if it was her saying we should do anything then id take it and not argue it at all.

Edited May 24, 2007 by WhiteSoxFan1

[Chisoxfn]

There's at least 2 other members here cooking as well.

Thats fantastic news. Congrats Steff (ROOT BEER)

[LosMediasBlancas]

Understood.

 

I am starting to better understand whats going on with her parents , but all I can really do is know that in my heart I have good intentions. Im not someone who would ever use someone just for sex (at least without them knowing) or someone who would ever cheat. Id be willing to have a commited relationship, and treat her the way I believe women should be treated. That said, Ithink I have problems when it comes to attachment. IM not clingy and im not in anyway forceful because I keep it to myself, but I tend to fall head over heels for someone pretty easily and get easily anxious. I know theres plenty of fish in the sea, but I always seem to concentrate on one at a time. Then they get most of my attention.

I do have a little bit of an italian temper of not liking being told what to do, but its really not as bad as it probably sounds. Sure I dont like the fact that me and her both want to hang out and still have trouble doing so, but if it was her saying we should do anything then id take it and not argue it at all.

 

 

I feel you.

Bottom line is you're at the beach trying to pick up one grain of sand.

[WhiteSoxFan1]

Well interesting turn of events. Shes going to her friends apartment for the weekend out in the city. Says that her friend is going to a party tomorrow night which the girl I like isnt interested in and says her friend has no problem with her having me over and us hanging out at her apartment by ourselfs. Ofcourse like you guys mentioned, at 17 as quickly as things are planned, even quicker they can change, so if this actually goes through it should be an interesting weekend. A lot of questions could be answered, and im sure a ton of new ones will arise.

Edited May 24, 2007 by WhiteSoxFan1

[mreye]

Well interesting turn of events. Shes going to her friends apartment for the weekend out in the city. Says that her friend is going to a party tomorrow night which the girl I like isnt interested in and says her friend has no problem with her having me over and us hanging out at her apartment by ourselfs. Ofcourse like you guys mentioned, at 17 as quickly as things are planned, even quicker they can change, so if this actually goes through it should be an interesting weekend. A lot of questions could be answered, and im sure a ton of new ones will arise.

 

Behave yourself. That's someone's daughter!!

[WhiteSoxFan1]

Behave yourself. That's someone's daughter!!

As much as this might surprise you im not thinking sexual at all. Im am thinking first kiss though. All we have done is hold hands so far during both the 2nd and 3rd dates. The plan she mentioned is just to watch movies all night, but to be honest I really wouldnt be surprised if the entire hang out got messed up. Maybe im just being a negitive thinker, but im finding out fast with 17 year olds plans change every 30 seconds.

Edited May 24, 2007 by WhiteSoxFan1

[DePloderer]

Well interesting turn of events. Shes going to her friends apartment for the weekend out in the city. Says that her friend is going to a party tomorrow night which the girl I like isnt interested in and says her friend has no problem with her having me over and us hanging out at her apartment by ourselfs. Ofcourse like you guys mentioned, at 17 as quickly as things are planned, even quicker they can change, so if this actually goes through it should be an interesting weekend. A lot of questions could be answered, and im sure a ton of new ones will arise.

 

Aaaaaaaaagh!!!

 

But then again you are in England and all she does is go to Tea parties and Fox hunts, right?

 

Yep,and she assures me that i'ts the knitting cicle on Friday night.

[LosMediasBlancas]

Well interesting turn of events. Shes going to her friends apartment for the weekend out in the city. Says that her friend is going to a party tomorrow night which the girl I like isnt interested in and says her friend has no problem with her having me over and us hanging out at her apartment by ourselfs. Ofcourse like you guys mentioned, at 17 as quickly as things are planned, even quicker they can change, so if this actually goes through it should be an interesting weekend. A lot of questions could be answered, and im sure a ton of new ones will arise.

 

 

So, wait a minute. Her parents, who treat her like a prisoner, are allowing her to visit a friend who has her own apartment?? I find it hard to believe they'd even allow her to have a friend who has her own apartment.

[WhiteSoxFan1]

So, wait a minute. Her parents, who treat her like a prisoner, are allowing her to visit a friend who has her own apartment?? I find it hard to believe they'd even allow her to have a friend who has her own apartment.

 

Yea goes to uic. Shes going to a party tonight and letting me and her hang out at her apartment. We are just planning on watching movies though.

Edited May 25, 2007 by WhiteSoxFan1

[RockRaines]

Yea goes to uic. Shes going to a party tonight and letting me and her hang out at her apartment. We are just planning on watching movies though.

Nice, right by me. You mind if I take a shot at her?

[southsider2k5]

Nice, right by me. You mind if I take a shot at her?

 

Aren't you a little old for 17 year old girls?

[RockRaines]

Aren't you a little old for 17 year old girls?

Hey, its legal isnt it?

 

IM like the MLB, I like to draft em straight out of high school.

[WhiteSoxFan1]

Hey, its legal isnt it?

 

IM like the MLB, I like to draft em straight out of high school.

[Chisoxfn]

Hey, its legal isnt it?

 

IM like the MLB, I like to draft em straight out of high school.

What country do you live in...I could swear the laws were 18 (at least they are here). That said I'm the last person that should be talking consider my last 3 ex's were under 21 (but over 18).

[WhiteSoxFan1]

Just thought id let you guys know that Friday night went good. We got along great and bonded very well. We were at her friends apartment and stayed the night, while her friend went to some club. We watched tv and movies most of the night. Saturday night I met her a a few of her friends at caribu coffee and sat around and talked for about 2 hours. Sunday me, her, my friend john and 3 of her friends all went to go see pirates 3, and then yesterday me and her went by ourselfs to see another movie.

 

side note: I talked to her dad on the phone. I guess he was joking around with her on sunday about me and decided to try to call me from her phone and see how i answered and acted. I missed the call though. So i called her back and she told me it was him joking around at their family bbq. So later that day I returned his call to his cell phone and we had a small laugh. He approved me taking her out to see the movie yesterday and he gave me the typical dad schtic. We are officially dating, but i think her parents think we are just friends.

Edited May 29, 2007 by WhiteSoxFan1

[aboz56]

If you are in college and she is in high school, there's most of the problem.

 

Find a girl who is more your age or least one that is not in HS. When you turn 21, you won't want a girlfriend, at least I know I didn't when I first starting going to the bars.

 

My advice, based on reading this thread and knowing that you are 20, is keep your options open at this point.

 

Also, just from a common sense standpoint, I wouldn't be posting my "foreplay" experiences with this girl, who is underage, on a public message board.

[WhiteSoxFan1]

If you are in college and she is in high school, there's most of the problem.

 

Find a girl who is more your age or least one that is not in HS. When you turn 21, you won't want a girlfriend, at least I know I didn't when I first starting going to the bars.

 

My advice, based on reading this thread and knowing that you are 20, is keep your options open at this point.

 

Also, just from a common sense standpoint, I wouldn't be posting my "foreplay" experiences with this girl, who is underage, on a public message board.

 

Alright my bad. It is legal in illinois, but reguardless I took that too far and edited it. Anyway, she graduates in 2 days so she'll be out of high school, but her plans are to move to florida for college. So with that and me turning 21 im sure this will turn into just a summer fling. At this point though we are getting along well.

Edited May 29, 2007 by WhiteSoxFan1

[DrunkBomber]

This sounds like an MTV reality show. Id recommend trying something I learned at SIU on your next date. Its called the DrunkBomb.

[WhiteSoxFan1]

This sounds like an MTV reality show. Id recommend trying something I learned at SIU on your next date. Its called the DrunkBomb.

 

Why does it seem so reality show like?