Another one of these topics

[WilliamTell]

Well, you've at least made yourself known.

If she wants to start something with you, she can find you...can't she?

 

You would be correct, she knows how to contact me.

[WilliamTell]

Perhaps some of the ladies that frequent our site would like to offer some advice...

 

I'd like to hear from them as well if possible. I know this was my question but if someone else was to have some situation kind of like this, maybe it will help them too.

[Gene Honda Civic]

I own a domain name based off that movie

[FlaSoxxJim]

I own a domain name based off that movie

 

sportofthefuture.com?

 

imincarceratedlloyd.net??

 

pretty cool.

 

 

[RockRaines]

Give it up. For each girl like that, there are 200 others waiting in the wings. Most likely once you start glancing at them, she may come running. The best advice I could give is not to dwell on one girl or another, as you never know who could come walking into your life when you open your eyes.

[thedoctor]

These threads have been around before and I made one nearly 4 years ago as an 18 year old. The advice really helped then, but now as a 22 year old, it seems I still am clueless with the female sex.

 

my advice would be to get used to this concept. four years from now it will still be the same for you and every other male on the planet.

Edited March 25, 2008 by thedoctor

[Rowand44]

LMAO, next round on me.

Are you staying in C'dale over Summer? Im gonna be down for a wedding May 22nd - 26th, my buddy is getting married. There will be much drinking and debauchery leading up to, through, and afterwards.

Big time maybe on this one. I hated staying over the summer last year but a lot of my friends are staying down here now and I'm really tempted to. It'd be hard to explain it to the parents though as I never come home. That being said, I really am leaning towards staying here now. I'll let you know when I'm for sure.

[Felix]

"I got a question: if you guys know so much about women, how come you're here at like the Gas 'n Sip on a Saturday night completely alone drinking beers with no women anywhere?"

 

 

John Cusack, I think I love you.

Edited March 25, 2008 by Felix

[southsider2k5]

Joan Cusack, I think I love you.

 

EWWWWW!

[IlliniKrush]

Big time maybe on this one. I hated staying over the summer last year but a lot of my friends are staying down here now and I'm really tempted to. It'd be hard to explain it to the parents though as I never come home. That being said, I really am leaning towards staying here now. I'll let you know when I'm for sure.

"Hi, mom? I was planning on coming home today, but I got drunk again, so I can't drive. I'll try again tomorrow. Love you!"

 

No, it's not an excuse, it's an actual explanation for this kid.

 

Every single day.

[Kyyle23]

Big time maybe on this one. I hated staying over the summer last year but a lot of my friends are staying down here now and I'm really tempted to. It'd be hard to explain it to the parents though as I never come home. That being said, I really am leaning towards staying here now. I'll let you know when I'm for sure.

 

you gotta be kidding me. You hated staying there over the summer? How is that possible? No lines at the bars, sunset concerts every thursday, endless house bands at Pinch Penny with the occasional big name, walking the wine trail in Anna(or, stumbling the last half of the wine trail), no lines at the bars, afterhours parties every night, Sox games at the Cellar(as well as big buckets of peanuts for 1.50), Saluki baseball games on the hill, no lines at the bars. And on top of that, you can just take a weekend trip to St louis and party on the Landing.

 

You better stay. I will be down there for 5 days and by the 5th day you will have the rest of your summer planned out.

 

"Hi, mom? I was planning on coming home today, but I got drunk again, so I can't drive. I'll try again tomorrow. Love you!"

 

No, it's not an excuse, it's an actual explanation for this kid.

 

Every single day.

 

Carbondale changes your priorities.

 

Priority 1. Alcohol

 

Priority 2. Women

 

Priority 3. Alcohol

 

Priority 4. Women

 

Priority 5. School

 

Priority 6. Choosing who carries the other guy home

 

Edited March 26, 2008 by kyyle23

[Rowand44]

you gotta be kidding me. You hated staying there over the summer? How is that possible? No lines at the bars, sunset concerts every thursday, endless house bands at Pinch Penny with the occasional big name, walking the wine trail in Anna(or, stumbling the last half of the wine trail), no lines at the bars, afterhours parties every night, Sox games at the Cellar(as well as big buckets of peanuts for 1.50), Saluki baseball games on the hill, no lines at the bars. And on top of that, you can just take a weekend trip to St louis and party on the Landing.

 

You better stay. I will be down there for 5 days and by the 5th day you will have the rest of your summer planned out.

Carbondale changes your priorities.

 

Priority 1. Alcohol

 

Priority 2. Women

 

Priority 3. Alcohol

 

Priority 4. Women

 

Priority 5. School

 

Priority 6. Choosing who carries the other guy home

It's just not as fun when you're not hanging with your buddies.

 

If you throw the Sox and SIU bball on that priority list somewhere then it's pretty much perfect.

 

Sorry for taking your thread over a bit, tell.

[WilliamTell]

It's just not as fun when you're not hanging with your buddies.

 

If you throw the Sox and SIU bball on that priority list somewhere then it's pretty much perfect.

 

Sorry for taking your thread over a bit, tell.

 

oh I don't care, it's not a big deal, there's been a lot of good advice in the thread.

[WilliamTell]

This is my 10,000th post and since 10k is a milestone on soxtalk, and it took me nearly 4 years to reach it, I've decided not to start a new thread, but to put it in a thread I started a couple of days ago.

 

Thanks for everyone who's put up some advice in this thread, it has really helped. Hopefully another 10,000 posts will come.

Edited March 26, 2008 by WilliamTell

[FlaSoxxJim]

This is my 10,000th post and since 10k is a milestone on soxtalk, and it took me nearly 4 years to reach it, I've decided not to start a new thread, but to put it in a thread I started a couple of days ago.

 

Thanks for everyone who's put up some advice in this thread, it has really helped. Hopefully another 10,000 posts will come.

 

10K is indeed a milestone, so congratulations. I remember what a big occasion it was when Southsider2K5 made his 10,000th post. Soxtalk had already been up and running for a good day and a half by that time IIRC.

[Flash Tizzle]

These threads have been around before and I made one nearly 4 years ago as an 18 year old. The advice really helped then, but now as a 22 year old, it seems I still am clueless with the female sex.

 

When I was a senior in high school there was a freshman girl that liked me a lot. She was borderline obsessed about me which I didn't like, but liked at the same time. I didn't want to get involved with her because I thought 18 and 15 was too big of a difference even though I thought there was a possiblility that something great could come out of it. Then not too long after I graduated she started dating a guy and I was angry at myself for not trying to take our friendship to the next level. I grew to accept not being in a relationship with her and I got in to a few of my own over the next 3 years, but she was always on my mind. I didn't talk to her very much after I graduated from high school. Maybe a few times a year in 2005 and 2006. In 2007 I didn't talk to her a lot, but started talking to her more once the school year started and she had gone off to college.

 

Eventually and her and her boyfriend broke up in November and a month later I decided to send her a message about how I felt about her. It ended up being a big mistake and I regret sending it because it freaked her that I could still like her for this long. She said she didn't understand how I could since we rarely talked anymore and didn't know each other. Unfortunately for me she said she didn't have any feelings for me and was "unsure" if she ever did. When January and February came, we started talking more frequently, maybe once a week or so. When spring break started she wanted to know if we were going to hangout at all over break, since we had talked about it a couple of times in January. I was surprised she sent me a message and we ended up having a group outing last Wednesday. It was fun to hangout because that was the first time we've hungout before, we had talked at school and at graduation parties over the past couple of years but hanging out. The bad part seemed to be that I could tell she didn't have feelings for me anymore, at least she didn't act like she did.

 

After that long story, what I'd like to know is if I should give up thinking of a relationship or not. It's so hard for me to give up after all of this progression over the last few months. I know I want a relationship with this girl not because of her looks, she's a nice looking girl, but I want it because of her personality, her values, and she's just a goofball which I really like in her. It seems to be as if she only wants to be friends instead. But I know if I keep trying and hoping for a relationship I'll more than likely hurt myself. I was a fool for not trying for her 4 years ago, it looks like if I keep trying for her now I could be a fool again. We also go to different schools, she goes to Iowa State and I go to Northern Iowa.

 

Thanks for reading.

The sad truth here is you can't manufacture romance. Especially if close contact isn't maintained. Perhaps meeting you for the first time in a social setting was awkward. It may change in the future, who knows? What'd I do is avoid any mention of your feelings (as several others have noted) and work towards bulding a friendship. Even if that makes you feel like a pussy. Just ask yourself this-- who is going to decide whether a relationship exists? Her. You don't hold any advantage here since you've essentially played your cards. She's going to hold your balls anyway you look at it. Would you want her in your life, even if it's just as a friend, or risk everything playing games in a vein attempt for her to open herself up to you?

 

Honestly, I'd say it's going to be tough. Especially since the mutual attraction noted by you occured in high school, when she was only 15 years old, and contact was sparse since graduation.

 

 

 

 

[Felix]

EWWWWW!

Hey now, that's an unfair quote change. John >>>>>> Joan

 

I mean, really. Do I listen to pop music because I'm miserable or am I miserable because I listen to pop music?

 

[WilliamTell]

The sad truth here is you can't manufacture romance. Especially if close contact isn't maintained. Perhaps meeting you for the first time in a social setting was awkward. It may change in the future, who knows? What'd I do is avoid any mention of your feelings (as several others have noted) and work towards bulding a friendship. Even if that makes you feel like a pussy. Just ask yourself this-- who is going to decide whether a relationship exists? Her. You don't hold any advantage here since you've essentially played your cards. She's going to hold your balls anyway you look at it. Would you want her in your life, even if it's just as a friend, or risk everything playing games in a vein attempt for her to open herself up to you?

 

Honestly, I'd say it's going to be tough. Especially since the mutual attraction noted by you occured in high school, when she was only 15 years old, and contact was sparse since graduation.

 

That's some great advice as well. Relationships don't start with distance, obviously there could be exceptions but yeah. It was awkward for me to finally hangout with her so I would guess it was for her too. Fortunately I think we're building a friendship because we've a talked off and on for the past few months, and especially the last 2 weeks. It's a decent sign of friendship if she's messaging me randomly. While I think it's nearly impossible to get what I want out of it, and I can accept that, but if there's a chance it will be over the summer as long as she's willing to hangout. We'll be in the same town, more activities in the summer so we'll see. It's not hard to figure out I'm one of those "nice guys" and I do want her to be happy even if it's not with me. Maybe this varies for everyone, but for me, if I was attracted to someone, it was easier to become attracted again to them. I know she doesn't want a relationship right now and just wants to be single, which I can understand. Whatever happens I hope I can be satisfied that this time I gave the effort and tried the best I could, and hopefully in the end I'll be friends with her again. Unfortunately in some things it's a struggle being friends, we've both changed a lot in 4 years.

[iamshack]

you gotta be kidding me. You hated staying there over the summer? How is that possible? No lines at the bars, sunset concerts every thursday, endless house bands at Pinch Penny with the occasional big name, walking the wine trail in Anna(or, stumbling the last half of the wine trail), no lines at the bars, afterhours parties every night, Sox games at the Cellar(as well as big buckets of peanuts for 1.50), Saluki baseball games on the hill, no lines at the bars. And on top of that, you can just take a weekend trip to St louis and party on the Landing.

 

You better stay. I will be down there for 5 days and by the 5th day you will have the rest of your summer planned out.

Carbondale changes your priorities.

 

Priority 1. Alcohol

 

Priority 2. Women

 

Priority 3. Alcohol

 

Priority 4. Women

 

Priority 5. School

 

Priority 6. Choosing who carries the other guy home

 

Oh, how I miss my alma mater....those were the days....

 

I was reminiscing on Sunday remembering how my neighbors had an Easter jello shot hunt my last semester in CDale....the memories...

[southsider2k5]

This is my 10,000th post and since 10k is a milestone on soxtalk, and it took me nearly 4 years to reach it, I've decided not to start a new thread, but to put it in a thread I started a couple of days ago.

 

Thanks for everyone who's put up some advice in this thread, it has really helped. Hopefully another 10,000 posts will come.

 

Despite being from Iowa, a very quality poster you are! Here is to the next 10,000

[southsider2k5]

10K is indeed a milestone, so congratulations. I remember what a big occasion it was when Southsider2K5 made his 10,000th post. Soxtalk had already been up and running for a good day and a half by that time IIRC.

 

HEY THAT IS NOT FAIR! Mostly because I didn't find Soxtalk for about six months...

[WilliamTell]

Despite being from Iowa, a very quality poster you are! Here is to the next 10,000

 

Hey thanks Yoda, haha, congrats on 50,000 for you!

Edited March 27, 2008 by WilliamTell

[chimpy2121]

Just based off of personal experience I would say give up on it. I was in that situation for 3 years on and off again. It sucked. My situation was a little different though as I broke up with the girl. I still liked her a lot, but everytime we hung out it became more and more overly awkward. She moved on and I didn't despite being the one that broke up with her. I kept trying to get her to like me again, and sometimes it got close, but it never happened (I can't blame her though). It was horrible goin through that and if I could go back I would have moved on instead of dealing with that.

 

 

Congrats on the 10k!

[WilliamTell]

Just based off of personal experience I would say give up on it. I was in that situation for 3 years on and off again. It sucked. My situation was a little different though as I broke up with the girl. I still liked her a lot, but everytime we hung out it became more and more overly awkward. She moved on and I didn't despite being the one that broke up with her. I kept trying to get her to like me again, and sometimes it got close, but it never happened (I can't blame her though). It was horrible goin through that and if I could go back I would have moved on instead of dealing with that.

Congrats on the 10k!

 

Thanks for the congrats.

 

It's good to know that other people have been through the same situation in a way. I still don't have a clue about what I'm going to do, but I'm not worried about that right now. This should be in an entirely different thread but I'm gonna put it in here. The past 12 hours have basically sucked. My truck wouldn't start today when I was going to go donate blood like the good person I am, haha, then while going on a bike ride today, my tire went all flat but luckily I was close to a gas station so I could pump it up, then I hear my great aunt died, then one of my best friends, also friends with this girl this thread is about, went suicidal after breaking up with his girlfriend tonight. So I talked to this girl I've liked, his ex-girlfriend, himself, other friends, I couldn't find his parents phone number but I am going to contact him when I go home for the weekend. I pretty sure he's alright as of now, and I'm praying he is. He really needs counciling. As bad as a situation is with my friend, it was good that the girl and I could come together and talk about what actions we should take. So while I hate this situation in general, I was glad that we could get away from the awkwardness and just worry about our friend. Hopefully we can talk my friend into counciling or something.

[southsider2k5]

Hey thanks Yoda, haha, congrats on 50,000 for you!

 

How sad is that!