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What do i do?


Sonik22

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I love everything you guys are saying and this is really helping me to start to get over everything, its kinda therapeutic to just get it out of my mind and put it on here. Like i really feel that she will be there the rest of my life, now whether we take our relationship farther during that time is what ill have to just wait and see. But this girl basically is my life, she is my best friend. We'll see what happens. But i love SIU and i'm gonna start to do what she wants to do and thats to be more open to something new. Really i can't say thank you enough to all of you.

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QUOTE (kyyle23 @ Sep 9, 2008 -> 12:11 AM)
spoken like someone who has never been there

 

 

ha, been there plenty, actually signed on to go there but pulled out in favor of WMU at the last minute....just making a joke at the large percentage of hippy chicks...not trying to take anything away from the "hotness" of the girls at your school...

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QUOTE (DABearSoX @ Sep 8, 2008 -> 11:21 PM)
ha, been there plenty, actually signed on to go there but pulled out in favor of WMU at the last minute....just making a joke at the large percentage of hippy chicks...not trying to take anything away from the "whoreness" of the girls at your school...

fixed

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Sonik...I just have one thing to say, since I don't really know you or her, but I wanted to say this.

 

Don't date because SHE'S dating...date because YOU want to date. If you want to meet women, great. If you want to date one of those women, great. But don't do it because your best friend is doing it. Why? Because the woman you might meet at SIU could be Ms. Right. Or Ms. Right Now. But either way, you should go in to any relationship with a clear head, not out of spite (which it doesn't sound like) or to emulate anyone else. It should be on your terms. Just do what YOU are comfortable with.

 

Good luck and study hard.

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So now i basically f***ed everything up. I hooked up with a girl last night, and i just told her about it. I guess that was pretty wrong to do, but if she didnt really have the feelings i had for her why should she feel so upset about it? But she's just told me that everything is over between us. Wow, just f***.

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QUOTE (Sonik22 @ Sep 9, 2008 -> 09:31 PM)
So now i basically f***ed everything up. I hooked up with a girl last night, and i just told her about it. I guess that was pretty wrong to do, but if she didnt really have the feelings i had for her why should she feel so upset about it? But she's just told me that everything is over between us. Wow, just f***.

 

Ouch. Such is the way it goes with the fickle fairer sex. They'll say you should both 'see other people,' but if you actually do, then watch out.

 

Ross from "Friends': "We were ON A BREAK!"

 

Hey. . . This doesn't mean you were drinking on a week night now, does it?

 

Sorry. Trying to inject a little levity.

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QUOTE (Sonik22 @ Sep 9, 2008 -> 07:31 PM)
So now i basically f***ed everything up. I hooked up with a girl last night, and i just told her about it. I guess that was pretty wrong to do, but if she didnt really have the feelings i had for her why should she feel so upset about it? But she's just told me that everything is over between us. Wow, just f***.

I think in the long run telling her will be a good thing. Younger girls are so into playing games that if she starts thinking about you with other chicks that if she has any feelings for you it will really affect her. Its a much different feeling for her than knowing you are sitting there waiting for her. Id be willing to bet you will hear from her in the near future and the next time you see her you will get a lot of playful, "What about that other girl." If she thinks youve moved on and wants anything to do with you she will reach out to you. Dont sweat it, and either way, its Carbondale, its the best time of your life you should just enjoy it.

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QUOTE (Sonik22 @ Sep 9, 2008 -> 07:31 PM)
So now i basically f***ed everything up. I hooked up with a girl last night, and i just told her about it. I guess that was pretty wrong to do, but if she didnt really have the feelings i had for her why should she feel so upset about it? But she's just told me that everything is over between us. Wow, just f***.

 

I think you probably made the right choice. You're going on as she suggested you do and the majority of us suggested, and as others said this might make her realize what she's missing. Could be an example of not knowing what she has until it's gone. Don't bank on this though, keep going on with life and if a girl you like comes along, be with her.

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My first thought when reading your post was..."What's over?" I mean, nothing started, right? Don't sweat it...well, sweat it a little, cuz it's human nature. But, give her some time and things should at least get back to being friends. By the way, where does she go to school? Is she really far away?

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QUOTE (Sonik22 @ Sep 9, 2008 -> 07:31 PM)
So now i basically f***ed everything up. I hooked up with a girl last night, and i just told her about it. I guess that was pretty wrong to do, but if she didnt really have the feelings i had for her why should she feel so upset about it? But she's just told me that everything is over between us. Wow, just f***.

 

 

Well this is the best part of long distance relationships, the breakup. You dont have to see the person or interact with them, its just over.

 

Plenty of fish in that fishbowl Sonik, 4 years from now you will realize it was just a blip on the screen

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QUOTE (CanOfCorn @ Sep 10, 2008 -> 07:35 AM)
My first thought when reading your post was..."What's over?" I mean, nothing started, right? Don't sweat it...well, sweat it a little, cuz it's human nature. But, give her some time and things should at least get back to being friends. By the way, where does she go to school? Is she really far away?

Well I'm down here at SIU, and shes up in Wisconsin.

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QUOTE (Sonik22 @ Sep 9, 2008 -> 07:31 PM)
So now i basically f***ed everything up. I hooked up with a girl last night, and i just told her about it. I guess that was pretty wrong to do, but if she didnt really have the feelings i had for her why should she feel so upset about it? But she's just told me that everything is over between us. Wow, just f***.

So, you are letting her control you now? This is how girls control guys. She told you its over and got emotional, now you feel like what you did was wrong. First of all, dont tell her what you are doing. Dont tell her WHO you are doing. Do you think she would tell you about her walk of shame she did last weekend?

 

Have your fun, do the college thing, hook up with her during summer break, then maybe after school when you are older something will happen. Odds are you will meet someone even better at school if you keep an open mind and dont let a girl a state away pull your leash and make you heel.

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QUOTE (Sonik22 @ Sep 9, 2008 -> 07:31 PM)
So now i basically f***ed everything up. I hooked up with a girl last night, and i just told her about it. I guess that was pretty wrong to do, but if she didnt really have the feelings i had for her why should she feel so upset about it? But she's just told me that everything is over between us. Wow, just f***.

You didn't f*** anything up. Like someone said, you didn't really have a relationship to f*** up in the first place. And I don't see how a friend can get mad for you living your life, especially when she's already told you she's going to move on with hers.

 

You probably shouldn't have said anything about hooking up with anyone, since you probably wouldn't want to hear what she's done -- unless she's already told you about something she did. But yeah, you didn't really do anything wrong. Either she really has feelings for you and this is just a knee jerk angry reaction, in which case she'll cool down and talk to you sometime soon, or perhaps this was just a convoluted way for her to justify her wanting to sleep with someone else.

 

Either way, don't let her bully or control you. Let her make the next contact, and if she brings anything about this up to you, make sure you tell her she's being completely unfair, and that you can't be expected to wait around for her while she's dating other people.

 

Oh, and study hard.

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QUOTE (DrunkBomber @ Sep 10, 2008 -> 02:19 AM)
I think in the long run telling her will be a good thing. Younger girls are so into playing games that if she starts thinking about you with other chicks that if she has any feelings for you it will really affect her. Its a much different feeling for her than knowing you are sitting there waiting for her.

 

 

I think the Bomber has something here...

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  • 4 weeks later...

Hahah ok so thread update, shes dating some guy up at her college now. So yeah I'm getting over it step by step, but I prepared myself before this all happened so it's made it all easier. I've decided im just going to support her and see what happens. If theres a future for us then it will happen, but we'll see. It sucks, but thanks for everything guys!

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QUOTE (Sonik22 @ Oct 7, 2008 -> 11:12 PM)
Hahah ok so thread update, shes dating some guy up at her college now. So yeah I'm getting over it step by step, but I prepared myself before this all happened so it's made it all easier. I've decided im just going to support her and see what happens. If theres a future for us then it will happen, but we'll see. It sucks, but thanks for everything guys!

 

 

Support her? You mean be supportive of her dating some other dude? That's already happening and she doesn't give a s*** if you support it or not. When she breaks up with this guy you will have earned no points by being supportive. She won't be any more likely to date you then. Move on and forget about her.

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QUOTE (LosMediasBlancas @ Oct 8, 2008 -> 12:52 AM)
Move on and forget about her.

 

The sooner, the better.

This girl does NOT have a magic vagina.

She is NOT "supporting" you, she is dating some other dude.

Find someone who wants to be with you, or just be on your own until you do.

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QUOTE (The Critic @ Oct 8, 2008 -> 03:00 AM)
The sooner, the better.

This girl does NOT have a magic vagina.

She is NOT "supporting" you, she is dating some other dude.

Find someone who wants to be with you, or just be on your own until you do.

That.

 

There's plenty of fish in the sea, and she's already nailing some other dude up in college while you think about her. Get drunk, and find another girl. This one is dead to you.

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Away from here, take some time and think about everything you did and everything she did. Start a journal and list the stuff that you think was positive in your and her behavior, and the stuff that sucked. List the traits you liked about her and the traits that you could live with, and the traits that would be deal breakers down the road. Most people spend more time thinking about and planning a vacation than in selecting the one person who will have the most impact on your future happiness, what you achieve in life, and a whole lot more.

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QUOTE (The Critic @ Oct 8, 2008 -> 02:00 AM)
The sooner, the better.

This girl does NOT have a magic vagina.

She is NOT "supporting" you, she is dating some other dude.

Find someone who wants to be with you, or just be on your own until you do.

 

 

 

QUOTE (Steve9347 @ Oct 8, 2008 -> 07:31 AM)
That.

 

There's plenty of fish in the sea, and she's already nailing some other dude up in college while you think about her. Get drunk, and find another girl. This one is dead to you.

 

 

QUOTE (rangercal @ Oct 8, 2008 -> 07:34 AM)
get with her best friend.

In all seriousness, if you did pull that off, that would be revenge *10.

 

:gosox3:

 

 

LOL, we are all so bad. The funny thing is, 4 years down the line someone else is going to make a girl problem thread just like this, and Sonik is gonna jump in and say "Forget about her, go get drunk"

 

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