clyons Posted December 10, 2008 Share Posted December 10, 2008 My brothel no longer takes checks, and I'm just not comfortable carrying large amounts of cash. Any suggestions? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knightni Posted December 10, 2008 Share Posted December 10, 2008 I hear that the Emperor's Club is an excellent service. The 9th client space is open. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted December 10, 2008 Author Share Posted December 10, 2008 QUOTE (PlaySumFnJurny @ Dec 10, 2008 -> 04:57 PM) My brothel no longer takes checks, and I'm just not comfortable carrying large amounts of cash. Any suggestions? Credit cards are always the best option. But, someday you may run for public office, so you will not want to use one in your name, so use your wife's card. Much smarter. And be generous, leave a tip, hookers don't have any fun when guys come up short. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted December 10, 2008 Author Share Posted December 10, 2008 I'm invited to speak at a PETA conventions. I hear they love animals, and so do I. I fact I have a new leather trench coat. Should I wear that or is it too flashy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knightni Posted December 10, 2008 Share Posted December 10, 2008 QUOTE (Texsox @ Dec 10, 2008 -> 06:19 PM) I'm invited to speak at a PETA conventions. I hear they love animals, and so do I. I fact I have a new leather trench coat. Should I wear that or is it too flashy? It might be. Go with your fur coat instead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southsider2k5 Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 My company's Chirstmas Party is Friday night and I want to make the right impression. What should I do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balta1701 Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (knightni @ Dec 10, 2008 -> 03:31 PM) It might be. Go with your fur coat instead. Go buy some leather pants to go with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knightni Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (southsider2k5 @ Dec 10, 2008 -> 07:01 PM) My company's Chirstmas Party is Friday night and I want to make the right impression. What should I do? Anything involving alcohol, a santa suit and lots of harmless pinching, usually goes over well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knightni Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (Balta1701 @ Dec 10, 2008 -> 07:01 PM) Go buy some leather pants to go with it. Heck, edit in some some wildlife films from Versus to illustrate how popular animals are to the common man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted December 11, 2008 Author Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (southsider2k5 @ Dec 10, 2008 -> 06:01 PM) My company's Chirstmas Party is Friday night and I want to make the right impression. What should I do? If it is anything like a Christmas Party, I would hang some Mistletoe from my belt buckle and listen for the laughs. Remember, jokes aren't just for fellow employees, find the boss' wife and show her, she'll feel like one of the gang, and her husband will appreciate it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balta1701 Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 I need starting pitching and AJ Burnett is available for a contract on the order of 5 years, $90 million, similar to what Zambrano got. What should I do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted December 11, 2008 Author Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (Balta1701 @ Dec 10, 2008 -> 06:36 PM) I need starting pitching and AJ Burnett is available for a contract on the order of 5 years, $90 million, similar to what Zambrano got. What should I do? You gotta show the fans you are serious about winning, today and tomorrow. Don't be namby pamby, go 6/105 and show the world what you're made of! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knightni Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 Budget, schmudget. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FlaSoxxJim Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 So, I got really hammered last night at the bars and I drove home. I know I shouldn't, but I tried to drive very carefully. Turns out I didn't do so good, because this morning I went out to the garage and found a dude all mangled up and $hit and stuck in the grill of my car. He's still alive but he's really eff'd up, and he keeps asking me to drive him to the hospital. Obviously, if I do that a cop is probably going to see me driving a car with a guy stuck in the grill, and I'm sure that's something he could write me a ticket for. I'm already carrying a few points on my license, so I'm trying to be careful, you know? Any suggestions from anybody who has been in this situation before? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whitesoxfan101 Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (FlaSoxxJim @ Dec 11, 2008 -> 12:14 AM) So, I got really hammered last night at the bars and I drove home. I know I shouldn't, but I tried to drive very carefully. Turns out I didn't do so good, because this morning I went out to the garage and found a dude all mangled up and $hit and stuck in the grill of my car. He's still alive but he's really eff'd up, and he keeps asking me to drive him to the hospital. Obviously, if I do that a cop is probably going to see me driving a car with a guy stuck in the grill, and I'm sure that's something he could write me a ticket for. I'm already carrying a few points on my license, so I'm trying to be careful, you know? Any suggestions from anybody who has been in this situation before? Yep, and I'll keep it simple. Have a burn barrel? You know, one of those garbage can type things you burn leaves in? Dispose of the evidence there with a nice fire, clean up the car, and make sure the ashes are never found. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted December 11, 2008 Author Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (FlaSoxxJim @ Dec 11, 2008 -> 12:14 AM) So, I got really hammered last night at the bars and I drove home. I know I shouldn't, but I tried to drive very carefully. Turns out I didn't do so good, because this morning I went out to the garage and found a dude all mangled up and $hit and stuck in the grill of my car. He's still alive but he's really eff'd up, and he keeps asking me to drive him to the hospital. Obviously, if I do that a cop is probably going to see me driving a car with a guy stuck in the grill, and I'm sure that's something he could write me a ticket for. I'm already carrying a few points on my license, so I'm trying to be careful, you know? Any suggestions from anybody who has been in this situation before? The best approach is to look to the government for help. This is a really big problem and it call for a really big answer. I'd call the Senator from Massachusetts, Ted Kennedy for advice about vehicle mishaps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southsider2k5 Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 So I am a guy who has policital asperations in his hometown. The economics teacher at my own high school has asked me to come in and give a talk the trading industry and on the banking crisis, but I don't want to bore the kids to death. What can I do to entertain the kids, and maybe help to make them vote for me in the future? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted December 11, 2008 Author Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (southsider2k5 @ Dec 11, 2008 -> 07:41 AM) So I am a guy who has policital asperations in his hometown. The economics teacher at my own high school has asked me to come in and give a talk the trading industry and on the banking crisis, but I don't want to bore the kids to death. What can I do to entertain the kids, and maybe help to make them vote for me in the future? Kids like to learn new things. Show them how big league baseball players from the Dominican toughen their hands! They will probably tell their parents and you will have them excited about your campaign as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted December 11, 2008 Author Share Posted December 11, 2008 A letter to Soxtalk My boyfriend wants to pretend to make a porn film. He has all the lights and a camera in his room. He promises there will not be any film in the camera. What should I do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balta1701 Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (southsider2k5 @ Dec 11, 2008 -> 05:41 AM) So I am a guy who has policital asperations in his hometown. The economics teacher at my own high school has asked me to come in and give a talk the trading industry and on the banking crisis, but I don't want to bore the kids to death. What can I do to entertain the kids, and maybe help to make them vote for me in the future? Tell them they've all been hired as part of the corporate board for the new bank/political action committee you're starting. They can expect bonuses totaling roughly $4 million in about 3 weeks if they pay close attention. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balta1701 Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (Texsox @ Dec 11, 2008 -> 06:00 AM) A letter to Soxtalk My boyfriend wants to pretend to make a porn film. He has all the lights and a camera in his room. He promises there will not be any film in the camera. What should I do? Cover yourself in Neodymium magnets and give the camera a lap dance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balta1701 Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (whitesoxfan101 @ Dec 10, 2008 -> 10:51 PM) Yep, and I'll keep it simple. Have a burn barrel? You know, one of those garbage can type things you burn leaves in? Dispose of the evidence there with a nice fire, clean up the car, and make sure the ashes are never found. I've found strong acids to be a much more effective means of disposing of human remains than fire. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FlaSoxxJim Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (Texsox @ Dec 11, 2008 -> 09:00 AM) A letter to Soxtalk My boyfriend wants to pretend to make a porn film. He has all the lights and a camera in his room. He promises there will not be any film in the camera. What should I do? If he says there's no film then you have to believe there is no film, and you should indulge his fantasies. . . and maybe a few of your own. [Dayam, the dude is brilliant. Hopefully the bimbo is satisfied with the no film assurance and doesn't ask about video tape! Oh, wait. . . Is this mic still on??] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigSqwert Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 I want to become more environmentally conscious. What should I do with the huge pile of tires I've been collecting and my vintage collection of mercury based thermometers? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balta1701 Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 QUOTE (BigSqwert @ Dec 11, 2008 -> 09:09 AM) I want to become more environmentally conscious. What should I do with the huge pile of tires I've been collecting and my vintage collection of mercury based thermometers? Break the tires down in to chips, learn how to do your own vulcanization of rubber, mold them in to your own modern version of the terra cotta army. Harness the mercury from the thermometers. Pour it in to a moat to surround yourself. You wind up with the most wonderful tomb in the last 4000 years or so. And it's all done with recycled materials. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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