Jump to content

Relationship Advice Thread


witesoxfan

Recommended Posts

Sonik, sounds like you both need to chill out a bit on having a set age to be/not to be married by. Having said that, don't feel forced into anything. If there's no chilling out to be done, it sounds like it's not a goer at the moment.

 

 

The lifelong dream to be in whatever the f### it is that you're being such an unsupportive bastard about... With only the most superficial of knowledge about your situation, I'm suspecting that's one of those moments in a relationship where you can't blink first.

 

If you're not single by then, of course. :ph34r:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...
QUOTE (woods of ypres @ Dec 2, 2013 -> 01:12 PM)
Is there a rule of thumb that defines a woman just being flirty vs. real interest?

 

Thanks.

 

Yes. You ask them out. If they say no, you know which side of the fence you are on.

 

I mean, I'm sure there are other indicators too, but feel the situation out. If she's doing it with other guys too, stay away (unless you want a flirty girlfriend). If she is just flirty with you but not really anyone else, then you are probably looking good. This is a case to case basis sort of thing.

Edited by witesoxfan
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hey team here's a scenario:

 

Met a girl at a bar (yikes) Friday night. We were both pretty tipsy, had what I thought was a great conversation. It was mostly her talking ;)

 

Upon leaving I asked her for her phone number, but since my phone was dead, she asked me to give her mine. I did, she texted me her number the same night. The next day I texted her telling her that I had a good conversation and hope she made it home safe. I waited a copule days and called her last night. No answer. How do you proceed with that one? Did me texting her next day, scare her off? She seemed rather enthusiastic when exchenging phone numbers that night. Do I wait another week call her again? Is it over before it even begun?

 

Been out of the dating scene for a while, what do you all think?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Kind of ironic looking at Sonik's situation.

 

The girl Ive pretty much been in love with for 4 years now is struggling with breaking up with her boyfriend of a few years because hes wanting to settle down and this girl doesnt settle down. I obviously dont say anything more than meaningless bulls*** when she brings it up because its just such a morally bereft move to corrode a relationship like that.

 

I dont know, the delusion of getting back with her is over. I've had some great girls before and some great girls since but the feelings with them go away pretty quickly and I get over it like a normal person. This one though, man... she's got me and I cant let it go.

 

I really cannot go for it and just spew it all back out because its wrong, and she knows anyway without me saying. She flirts a little, we talk a lot... it sucks having to give up those little windows where I could start building something.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sounds like she is ignoring you. I'd say that one's over. That happened to me recently. Girl and I hit it off at the bar, were talking all night, she called me to tell me good night. Texted her the next day, but she was barely talking. I texted her one other time to try and set something up and she came up with an excuse to get out of it. Haven't bothered texting back because what's the point?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (pettie4sox @ Dec 6, 2013 -> 04:36 PM)
Women be crazy. Those women are the ones that will be crying on their couch ballooning themselves up with Ben and Jerry sobbing about being lonely.

 

This is a generalization but from my experience it seems women really want to have their cake and eat it.

i love cake

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (pettie4sox @ Dec 6, 2013 -> 03:36 PM)
Women be crazy. Those women are the ones that will be crying on their couch ballooning themselves up with Ben and Jerry sobbing about being lonely.

 

This is a generalization but from my experience it seems women really want to have their cake and eat it.

 

 

I laughed to myself when I read "cake."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (pettie4sox @ Dec 12, 2013 -> 09:11 AM)
Yeah I'm really trying not to be a dick. I'm trying to lead by example, hit the gym, eat right, etc... My friggin' gf will not go the f***ing gym. Arggggghhh! I need to push the envelope but this is a delicate topic. Any suggestions?

 

You can be stern with her, but if she isn't going to go to the gym, she's not going to go to the gym.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (witesoxfan @ Dec 12, 2013 -> 09:15 AM)
You can be stern with her, but if she isn't going to go to the gym, she's not going to go to the gym.

 

Yeah I know it's people's right to do what they want. I'm really starting to lose interest in her. I know, I know I'm shallow but we like what we like.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (pettie4sox @ Dec 12, 2013 -> 09:18 AM)
Yeah I know it's people's right to do what they want. I'm really starting to lose interest in her. I know, I know I'm shallow but we like what we like.

 

Really, I don't think that's shallow. You are trying to get in better shape, look better, and take care of yourself. The least she could do is go to the gym with you a couple times a week and do a mile or two on the treadmill/eliptical/bike to show that she is supporting you doing that.

 

Without trying to get too preachy, we go through a lot of difficult endeavors in life, and we need those closest to us to offer support. If it's not there, it's time to find different avenues to try and get that support.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (witesoxfan @ Dec 12, 2013 -> 07:41 AM)
Really, I don't think that's shallow. You are trying to get in better shape, look better, and take care of yourself. The least she could do is go to the gym with you a couple times a week and do a mile or two on the treadmill/eliptical/bike to show that she is supporting you doing that.

 

Without trying to get too preachy, we go through a lot of difficult endeavors in life, and we need those closest to us to offer support. If it's not there, it's time to find different avenues to try and get that support.

I dunno about this, Wite...I agree that we might all like our significant others to value their health and appearance, but I don't know if "the least" they could do is to accompany us to the gym a few times a week. What if she gardened a lot in the interest of growing produce to contribute to a healthy diet...would it be "the least" he could do to be out there with her three times a week planting tomatoes? I know I'd be like, yeah, you have fun with that Honey :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

We've been together almost 2 years now. I can see her getting complacent. I'm not a picky guy when it comes to how women dress or use make up (that's their prerogative). Hell, I don't care about her grooming habits either. I don't expect her to be a super model, but to just be in moderate shape would be suffice. She's gotten bigger and I'm just thinking to myself why does she think this is OK? I try to be passive aggressive by getting on the scale, showing her how my clothes barely fit anymore and stating how good it feels.

 

Getting into shape too has caused my mind to wander since I see fit and hot women at the gym.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (pettie4sox @ Dec 12, 2013 -> 08:00 AM)
We've been together almost 2 years now. I can see her getting complacent. I'm not a picky guy when it comes to how women dress or use make up (that's their prerogative). Hell, I don't care about her grooming habits either. I don't expect her to be a super model, but to just be in moderate shape would be suffice. She's gotten bigger and I'm just thinking to myself why does she think this is OK? I try to be passive aggressive by getting on the scale, showing her how my clothes barely fit anymore and stating how good it feels.

 

Getting into shape too has caused my mind to wander since I see fit and hot women at the gym.

I think all you can do is stress how important staying fit and healthy is to you, and like you mentioned, continue to tell her how great the benefits of working out are. But you can't force a person to prioritize that in their life anymore than you can force them to prioritize their career, or some hobby of theirs. People are who they are and they usually aren't going to stray from that too much.

 

If she just isn't your cup of tea anymore, then it is probably time to move on.

 

I dated someone a few years ago and I made the decision to move on, partially because of this exact same reason.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (iamshack @ Dec 12, 2013 -> 10:07 AM)
I think all you can do is stress how important staying fit and healthy is to you, and like you mentioned, continue to tell her how great the benefits of working out are. But you can't force a person to prioritize that in their life anymore than you can force them to prioritize their career, or some hobby of theirs. People are who they are and they usually aren't going to stray from that too much.

 

If she just isn't your cup of tea anymore, then it is probably time to move on.

 

I dated someone a few years ago and I made the decision to move on, partially because of this exact same reason.

 

Seriously? My biggest concern would be the fall out. A lot of friends and family have met this girl and I the same of hers. To break it off over something like this, I'm sure I'd be judged to kingdom come (from my family too).

 

I don't want to force her but I also feel myself not being attracted to her anymore.

 

I probably just need to man up and get it over with but I just feel like I would be a s***ty person for doing this.

Edited by pettie4sox
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...