Relationship Advice Thread

[whitesoxfan101]

I think she would appreciate that he went to look for it. He's the hunter after all. After you hook her, thats when you back away to make her crazy.

 

Indeed, that's ideally how you do it. Often times, it's the woman that hooks the guy and then backs away to make him crazy. It sounds like Rowand has the opportunity to turn the tables in that regard though, and if he can succesfully pull that off, he's in great shape.

[bigruss]

Demonstrate value

Engage physically

Nurture dependence

Neglect emotionally

Inspire hope

Separate entirely

 

[BigSqwert]

Demonstrate value

Engage physically

Nurture dependence

Neglect emotionally

Inspire hope

Separate entirely

/thread

[bigruss]

Move in

After

Completion

 

/thread

Fixed

[SoxAce]

Ask one of your mutual friends for her number. Not only will you get it, but she will hear you asked for it and went the extra mile.

 

Meh.. that'll just make me (and maybe even her seeing it) feel desperate actually. I'm too cool for that. If I was in his shoes, I'd just wait till the softball game, talk to her face to face and get the digits. But... I play it cool mamas.

[Chisoxfn]

And my only relationship advice is, the person you should be with should love you for who you are. You dont need to become a identity-less "WE" who disappears from existence because you got a GF or got married. If you stay true to who you are, you will find the person who compliments you and who you will never want to leave. If you arent currently with a person like that, leave, there are millions of people out there.

Couldn't agree with you more regarding the above. I feel it is very important to still have your individuality and to remain true to you as should she. And you should most definitely not dissapear from the face of the earth because you are in a relationship or married, etc.

 

I think we all know friends that have had that happen and more often than not, a few years or months later, they end up regretting it, realizing they lost a lot of close people and are stuck in a s***ty situation.

[Chisoxfn]

Ask one of your mutual friends for her number. Not only will you get it, but she will hear you asked for it and went the extra mile.

How the hell did it take this long for someone to suggest this? You have a group of friends, reach out to one of them for her number and call her. Don't buy into this BS of having it sit for a week. She isn't going to be like, how the hell did he get my number, etc, etc.

 

Plus, she posts on Soxtalk, so she already knows your MO.

[iamshack]

Meh.. that'll just make me (and maybe even her seeing it) feel desperate actually. I'm too cool for that. If I was in his shoes, I'd just wait till the softball game, talk to her face to face and get the digits. But... I play it cool mamas.

So Ger...if you had a really hot chick reach out through a friend of yours to get your number, you would honestly say "eh, too desperate, not interested." ?

[Soxy]

Meh.. that'll just make me (and maybe even her seeing it) feel desperate actually. I'm too cool for that. If I was in his shoes, I'd just wait till the softball game, talk to her face to face and get the digits. But... I play it cool mamas.

Best approach, imo.

[iamshack]

Best approach, imo.

Darn you women!!!

 

I don't have time for these games!

[Chisoxfn]

If she likes him, she's more than likely to be excited that he got her number and reached out to her. If she doesn't like him, than regardless nothing would matter.

 

And there is no way, if she likes him, that she would be scared or worried or think he's desperate for getting those digits and sending a simple text like shack described above.

 

But I could see her getting awful irritated if he waited. She could be like, dude, we did this and chatted about this (which you don't remember) and now he's just stood me up.

 

I think its a pretty no brainer that your best off doing something in the next day or two, as opposed to waiting another week.

[BrenBlackwood]

If she likes him, she's more than likely to be excited that he got her number and reached out to her. If she doesn't like him, than regardless nothing would matter.

 

And there is no way, if she likes him, that she would be scared or worried or think he's desperate for getting those digits and sending a simple text like shack described above.

 

But I could see her getting awful irritated if he waited. She could be like, dude, we did this and chatted about this (which you don't remember) and now he's just stood me up.

 

I think its a pretty no brainer that your best off doing something in the next day or two, as opposed to waiting another week.

 

 

Why, if she likes him too, can't she be the one to take the initiative to call him first? It would be just as easy for her to go through a mutual friend as it is for him.

[knightni]

Why, if she likes him too, can't she be the one to take the initiative to call him first? It would be just as easy for her to go through a mutual friend as it is for him.

It's the "GGW Principle." Women are much more easy to hang with when they've had a few than when they are sober.

 

She probably barely remembers everything.

[Soxy]

Darn you women!!!

 

I don't have time for these games!

I actually think the calling around or facebooking is more game playing. I mean, she could get his number or facebook him too.

[Soxy]

Why, if she likes him too, can't she be the one to take the initiative to call him first? It would be just as easy for her to go through a mutual friend as it is for him.

Thank you other lady poster.

 

So both girls vote wait.

 

Take that dudes.

[iamshack]

She just said she wished Chase wouldn't have waited when they met!

[Soxy]

She just said she wished Chase wouldn't have waited when they met!

I understood her post as saying she wished he wouldn't have been so reserved when they met?

 

 

[iamshack]

I understood her post as saying she wished he wouldn't have been so reserved when they met?

Yes...

[BrenBlackwood]

She just said she wished Chase wouldn't have waited when they met!

 

 

I'm more than satisfied with the way things turned out for Chase and myself. Looking back, I believe it happened the way it was supposed to ..I may not have been as interested had he thrown himself at me ..he let me know he liked me without being too eager or clingy ..I was confused, but it kept me interested in him. I liked him a lot, but was afraid to say anything myself because he has girls throwing themselves at him all the time, I didn't want to be "that girl". Where we are at this point in our lives, I'm comfortable with asking him, "If you liked me and wanted me to be your girl, why didn't you just say so?" ..he says he wanted to make sure I liked him for him and wasn't just another cleat chaser! Plus, he was just as confused as I was ...I mean, there was no question that we liked each other ..we just hadn't made it clear to each other that we wanted to make it official!!

[iamshack]

I'm more than satisfied with the way things turned out for Chase and myself. Looking back, I believe it happened the way it was supposed to ..I may not have been as interested had he thrown himself at me ..he let me know he liked me without being too eager or clingy ..I was confused, but it kept me interested in him. I liked him a lot, but was afraid to say anything myself because he has girls throwing themselves at him all the time, I didn't want to be "that girl". Where we are at this point in our lives, I'm comfortable with asking him, "If you liked me and wanted me to be your girl, why didn't you just say so?" ..he says he wanted to make sure I liked him for him and wasn't just another cleat chaser! Plus, he was just as confused as I was ...I mean, there was no question that we liked each other ..we just hadn't made it clear to each other that we wanted to make it official!!

Bren, Bren, Bren...

[SoxAce]

Darn you women!!!

 

I don't have time for these games!

 

Experience bro. Have alot of it over the years.

[iamshack]

Experience bro. Have alot of it over the years.

This reminds me of the young bull/old bull story...

[SoxAce]

And there is no way, if she likes him, that she would be scared or worried or think he's desperate for getting those digits and sending a simple text like shack described above.

 

But I could see her getting awful irritated if he waited. She could be like, dude, we did this and chatted about this (which you don't remember) and now he's just stood me up.

 

See this is what I meant before with soxtalk posters (the guys especially) over analyzing stuff. I mean it's a simple formula. Row, you can take advice from people here, but in reality, you just need the experience. Speaking from your shoes, I did the same thing Rock suggested when I was very young (many times) and let me just say it didn't turn out so well (it honestly never does, except for very certain situations). Guys can't think like a woman (we never will) but you have to know the inside outs. Now I don't try (or even wanna try, nobody is perfect) and act like I'm the love master, hitch or a giggalo, but I know damn well how to do certain situations even if some people see it as "a game." Now if you really need another brain to pick on privately, shoot me a PM Rowand, and I'll give some insight. I can even see here on this board who I know are pretty good on advise, cause of their experience on situations. People have their own ways of course, and the best ones you will hardly, if ever, see them asking for advise in a thread (obviously) or giving advise all the time (at times, good to hear, but I wouldn't bank on them). My two cents.

Edited August 5, 2010 by J.Reedfan8

[Rowand44]

Ha, surprised my situation got this much response. Anyways, not that anyone gives a s*** but with out talking to her or even doing anything yet, I ended up finding out she is indeed interested. Now the fun part we'll be to see if I can handle this correctly with out f***in it up.

 

We'll see what happens.

[iamshack]

See this is what I meant before with soxtalk posters (the guys especially) over analyzing stuff. I mean it's a simple formula. Row, you can take advice from people here, but in reality, you just need the experience. Speaking from your shoes, I did the same thing Rock suggested when I was very young (many times) and let me just say it didn't turn out so well (it honestly never does, except for very certain situations). Guys can't think like a woman (we never will) but you have to know the inside outs. Now I don't try (or even wanna try, nobody is perfect) and act like I'm the love master, hitch or a giggalo, but I know damn well how to do certain situations even if some people see it as "a game." Now if you really need another brain to pick on privately, shoot me a PM Rowand, and I'll give some insight. I can even see here on this board who I know are pretty good on advise, cause of their experience on situations. People have their own ways of course, and the best ones you will hardly, if ever, see them asking for advise in a thread (obviously) or giving advise all the time (at times, good to hear, but I wouldn't bank on them). My two cents.

Oh you are so full of crap, Ger....