Relationship Advice Thread

[whitesoxfan99]

Be cool. How long has it been since you sent the text?

 

I sent the text on Sunday afternoon.

[Reddy]

I sent the text on Sunday afternoon.

i know it sucks, but if she were into you she'd have texted back immediately or at least she would've by now. :/

 

this is why I hate texting, because it gives away all your power. In a phone conversation you HAVE to answer and you HAVE to see the conversation out to the end, but in facebook and text world, you put your happiness and your control entirely in their hands. It's fuggin' stupid.

[whitesoxfan99]

i know it sucks, but if she were into you she'd have texted back immediately or at least she would've by now. :/

 

this is why I hate texting, because it gives away all your power. In a phone conversation you HAVE to answer and you HAVE to see the conversation out to the end, but in facebook and text world, you put your happiness and your control entirely in their hands. It's fuggin' stupid.

 

Agreed. The weird thing was that she responded pretty much immediately to every text I sent for two weeks, let me know that she had no plans for this weekend and then only once I asked about hanging out did she go silent. I really don't get that at all. Luckily I have another girl I can move on to but I liked this one more than the one I'll be setting up a date with shortly.

Edited August 27, 2013 by whitesoxfan99

[witesoxfan]

There are times that I get texts from people I want to hang out with and I see the text, have every intention of getting back to it later on because I'm busy or something, and then completely space it off. That may or may not be the case here. Shooting a quick text might not be a bad idea. She did just get back from vacation and may have just wanted some time to put stuff away and get the post-vacation relaxation and then, like what happens, spaced it off.

[iamshack]

Agreed. The weird thing was that she responded pretty much immediately to every text I sent for two weeks, let me know that she had no plans for this weekend and then only once I asked about hanging out did she go silent. I really don't get that at all. Luckily I have another girl I can move on to but I liked this one more than the one I'll be setting up a date with shortly.

Why don't you actually call her?

[whitesoxfan99]

Why don't you actually call her?

 

Lol. I've spoken to her on the phone a number of times. We happened to be texting on Sunday so I just asked her then and we had set up dates both via text and phone previously. I'll probably give her a call tonight and if she ignores that just end my pursuit.

[Iwritecode]

Pick up the phone and give her a call? Or do people not do that anymore?

 

I've been out of the dating game since before cell phones were even popular much less texting.

[whitesoxfan99]

Pick up the phone and give her a call? Or do people not do that anymore?

 

I've been out of the dating game since before cell phones were even popular much less texting.

 

See my post above.

[Reddy]

There are times that I get texts from people I want to hang out with and I see the text, have every intention of getting back to it later on because I'm busy or something, and then completely space it off. That may or may not be the case here. Shooting a quick text might not be a bad idea. She did just get back from vacation and may have just wanted some time to put stuff away and get the post-vacation relaxation and then, like what happens, spaced it off.

 

yep, but if you're really into a new person you've been seeing, you wont space out.

[cabiness42]

As someone who is old enough to remember the UHF dial on televisions, I'm glad I didn't have to date in today's world. I was bad enough at it as it was, but throw in texting and Facebook and I'd have been even worse and it might have pushed me off the deep end.

[ChiliIrishHammock24]

There are times that I get texts from people I want to hang out with and I see the text, have every intention of getting back to it later on because I'm busy or something, and then completely space it off. That may or may not be the case here. Shooting a quick text might not be a bad idea. She did just get back from vacation and may have just wanted some time to put stuff away and get the post-vacation relaxation and then, like what happens, spaced it off.

 

True, but not to sound like a Debbie Downer, if she was really excited about it or really wanted to, you'd think she would have thought about it by now. 2 days later and she has yet to remember the date she wants to go on this weekend? That's kind of a bad sign I think. But of course, shooting her another text can't hurt your chances anymore than it would if she never replies at all.

[ChiliIrishHammock24]

As someone who is old enough to remember the UHF dial on televisions, I'm glad I didn't have to date in today's world. I was bad enough at it as it was, but throw in texting and Facebook and I'd have been even worse and it might have pushed me off the deep end.

 

s***, you ain't kidding, and now I have this other bulls*** to worry about in that I see this girl (talked about at length a few pages back) posting s*** on Twitter that I can't help but wonder if supposed to be directed towards me. I hate when people talk s*** indirectly on social media. After a short "snapchat convo" last night she tweets "It sucks that you are so annoying." Obviously I can't help but think she is referring to me, since it was like 5 minutes after our "snapchat convo" ended, and I was the last to "reply". It's real immature and I am trying my hardest to ignore it and not engage in that bulls***, but 20 years ago, hell, even 10 years you never really had to worry about seeing people publicly b**** about you "behind your back" to everyone.

[Iwritecode]

As someone who is old enough to remember the UHF dial on televisions, I'm glad I didn't have to date in today's world. I was bad enough at it as it was, but throw in texting and Facebook and I'd have been even worse and it might have pushed me off the deep end.

 

I have to imagine it's a lot easier today than it was back then.

 

Before we were limited to the people within our physical location. School, hometown, local hang-outs, etc...

 

Now you have the chance to interact with basically anyone that has an internet connection. It also lessens the fear of rejection since your initial contact isn't face-to-face with the other person.

 

[whitesoxfan99]

I have to imagine it's a lot easier today than it was back then.

 

Before we were limited to the people within our physical location. School, hometown, local hang-outs, etc...

 

Now you have the chance to interact with basically anyone that has an internet connection. It also lessens the fear of rejection since your initial contact isn't face-to-face with the other person.

 

The funny thing to me is that in my case I don't really fear the rejection. I would much prefer a girl just tell me she isn't interested then just start ignoring texts out of the blue after responding to everything almost immediately for a week and a half and apologizing to me in the one instance when she didn't respond to a text immediately. I just hate playing games and uncertainty.

[Y2HH]

The problem with many of you and dating is quite simple, and I can give you a few tips on how to fix it.

 

All you have to do is follow these five easy steps:

 

1) You'll have to get in better shape. Way, wayyyy better shape. This is a must, because she has to think you care about yourself more than you care about her, which will force her to try to make you care about her more than you care about yourself.

 

2) You'll have to learn how to let everyone around you know that you're better than them, without actually saying so, as that's the difference in being conceited, which nobody likes, and confidence, which the girls love. This will cause the girls to gravitate to you while telling their friends how annoying you are, but like a moth to flame, she will come.

 

3) You'll have to learn that when in the "group of BFFs" situation, where your actual target is the cutest one, be sure to pay more attention to her obviously less cute friends, as this will annoy her, and cause her to go out of her way to get your attention back from the lesser minions that surround her.

 

4) You'll have to learn how to be an "asshole", because let's face it, the ones you want to date love the asshole. Sure, they'll tell their very sad puppy dog friendzoned guy friend what an asshole you are, and how nice and awesome they are, but you'll be the one they're texting or calling later that night for some action.

 

5) You'll have to get way better looking. This is probably the most important step. If you can get them to say to anyone they know, "He's not THAT good looking!", then you've won.

 

If you follow these simple steps, I guarantee that dating will be easier, more successful, and even if you go out of your way to f*** it up, they'll forgive you.

[LittleHurt05]

I have to imagine it's a lot easier today than it was back then.

 

Before we were limited to the people within our physical location. School, hometown, local hang-outs, etc...

 

Now you have the chance to interact with basically anyone that has an internet connection. It also lessens the fear of rejection since your initial contact isn't face-to-face with the other person.

 

Nowadays it is much easier to directly contact a girl. In the past, you had to call her house, then her parents would pick up, and you would have to ask them to speak with her. So nerve wracking!

[Iwritecode]

The funny thing to me is that in my case I don't really fear the rejection. I would much prefer a girl just tell me she isn't interested then just start ignoring texts out of the blue after responding to everything almost immediately for a week and a half and apologizing to me in the one instance when she didn't respond to a text immediately. I just hate playing games and uncertainty.

 

I was talking about the fear of rejection when you actually had to work up the courage to physically walk up to her and say "Hi, my name is..." Many people could never get past that. Talking via the internet or text makes it much easier.

 

I would have never met my wife had she not approached me first. I'm better now than I was when I was younger but I'm still very introverted.

[Iwritecode]

Nowadays it is much easier to directly contact a girl. In the past, you had to call her house, then her parents would pick up, and you would have to ask them to speak with her. So nerve wracking!

 

Then your parents would complain that you were on the phone when they needed to use it.

[whitesoxfan99]

I was talking about the fear of rejection when you actually had to work up the courage to physically walk up to her and say "Hi, my name is..." Many people could never get past that. Talking via the internet or text makes it much easier.

 

I would have never met my wife had she not approached me first. I'm better now than I was when I was younger but I'm still very introverted.

 

Got it. Yeah, I'm not great at the initial ice breaker but that is more an issue of lack of game then fearing rejection.

[witesoxfan]

The problem with many of you and dating is quite simple, and I can give you a few tips on how to fix it.

 

All you have to do is follow these five easy steps:

 

1) You'll have to get in better shape. Way, wayyyy better shape. This is a must, because she has to think you care about yourself more than you care about her, which will force her to try to make you care about her more than you care about yourself.

 

2) You'll have to learn how to let everyone around you know that you're better than them, without actually saying so, as that's the difference in being conceited, which nobody likes, and confidence, which the girls love. This will cause the girls to gravitate to you while telling their friends how annoying you are, but like a moth to flame, she will come.

 

3) You'll have to learn that when in the "group of BFFs" situation, where your actual target is the cutest one, be sure to pay more attention to her obviously less cute friends, as this will annoy her, and cause her to go out of her way to get your attention back from the lesser minions that surround her.

 

4) You'll have to learn how to be an "asshole", because let's face it, the ones you want to date love the asshole. Sure, they'll tell their very sad puppy dog friendzoned guy friend what an asshole you are, and how nice and awesome they are, but you'll be the one they're texting or calling later that night for some action.

 

5) You'll have to get way better looking. This is probably the most important step. If you can get them to say to anyone they know, "He's not THAT good looking!", then you've won.

 

If you follow these simple steps, I guarantee that dating will be easier, more successful, and even if you go out of your way to f*** it up, they'll forgive you.

 

I think what you are suggesting is steps on how to make men become alpha males. These are guidelines that will get guys laid and I'm sure some dates, but they are not universal truths, especially once you begin dating someone.

 

The #1 factor above all else is confidence. If you go up to a girl stuttering and pissing yourself, you won't get much more than maybe a sympathy date. Yes, there are a lot of these that are important, but without confidence, you are f'ed.

[iamshack]

I think what you are suggesting is steps on how to make men become alpha males. These are guidelines that will get guys laid and I'm sure some dates, but they are not universal truths, especially once you begin dating someone.

 

The #1 factor above all else is confidence. If you go up to a girl stuttering and pissing yourself, you won't get much more than maybe a sympathy date. Yes, there are a lot of these that are important, but without confidence, you are f'ed.

Yeah, this reminds me of that book that went around about 15 years ago...The Game or whatever it was...

[greg775]

The problem with many of you and dating is quite simple, and I can give you a few tips on how to fix it.

 

All you have to do is follow these five easy steps:

 

1) You'll have to get in better shape. Way, wayyyy better shape. This is a must, because she has to think you care about yourself more than you care about her, which will force her to try to make you care about her more than you care about yourself.

 

2) You'll have to learn how to let everyone around you know that you're better than them, without actually saying so, as that's the difference in being conceited, which nobody likes, and confidence, which the girls love. This will cause the girls to gravitate to you while telling their friends how annoying you are, but like a moth to flame, she will come.

 

3) You'll have to learn that when in the "group of BFFs" situation, where your actual target is the cutest one, be sure to pay more attention to her obviously less cute friends, as this will annoy her, and cause her to go out of her way to get your attention back from the lesser minions that surround her.

 

4) You'll have to learn how to be an "asshole", because let's face it, the ones you want to date love the asshole. Sure, they'll tell their very sad puppy dog friendzoned guy friend what an asshole you are, and how nice and awesome they are, but you'll be the one they're texting or calling later that night for some action.

 

5) You'll have to get way better looking. This is probably the most important step. If you can get them to say to anyone they know, "He's not THAT good looking!", then you've won.

 

If you follow these simple steps, I guarantee that dating will be easier, more successful, and even if you go out of your way to f*** it up, they'll forgive you.

 

I would pretty much agree with this, at least regarding very hot girls in college and their early to mid 20s.

 

There are always exceptions, though. I know a guy who married a very sweet, kind girl who I'd physically rate an 8. They met at a party, she facebooked him and sent him a message saying they'd met that night, he got up the guts to ask her out. No games, exclusive dating and few years later they were married. He can't believe how he got such a perfect girl since he considers himself a 6.

 

Then there's that married guy I know who cheats on his wife.

We go to a Hooters type place one day to eat lunch (I know, pretty lame considering the food sucks) because he goes there to drink once a week and wants me to go with him for lunch. We go there and the owner comes out to talk to us and he introduces us to some employees including a waitress who is a 10. He also introduces us to a set of gorgeous twins, but anyway, my friend goes back to the place one night and the 10 talks to him and they go to another bar when she gets off work.

So he takes her out twice to great restaurants, she's all into him texting all the time. He helps her move one day. Finally they have sex. He said it was great, no hiccups there. Great sex.

Now she's not texting him at all. When she does text, the tone is not sexual like it was before. He's ready to give up on her. Now is this because he's married and she sees no future in it? They've finally had sex and that's it? Or is it because he's been very nice to her with the nice restaurants, etc? She is 25 with 2 kids and her exes treat her s***ty. He's treated her so nice, is he getting the nice-guy dump?

 

My point is I've seen people meet and there's a storybook dating experience/marriage. And there's many many more who have to play the game constantly and it frustrates them. I would think once girls hit the age of 27, 28, they change a bit if they want to get married, have kids. I do know some hot 30 year olds at work who are single and even are staying home alone on weekend nights probably because they were too picky and finally opportunities let up to meet people, except at work.

Comments?

Edited August 27, 2013 by greg775

[RockRaines]

my tip is always remember there is something to do. Dont sit there and be still and act like this girl or that girl is your whole life, because they arent. Get off your ass and go do something for you. Then when you arent looking, a girl will come hunting for you.

[ChiliIrishHammock24]

I would pretty much agree with this, at least regarding very hot girls in college and their early to mid 20s.

 

There are always exceptions, though. I know a guy who married a very sweet, kind girl who I'd physically rate an 8. They met at a party, she facebooked him and sent him a message saying they'd met that night, he got up the guts to ask her out. No games, exclusive dating and few years later they were married. He can't believe how he got such a perfect girl since he considers himself a 6.

 

Then there's that married guy I know who cheats on his wife.

We go to a Hooters type place one day to eat lunch (I know, pretty lame considering the food sucks) because he goes there to drink once a week and wants me to go with him for lunch. We go there and the owner comes out to talk to us and he introduces us to some employees including a waitress who is a 10. He also introduces us to a set of gorgeous twins, but anyway, my friend goes back to the place one night and the 10 talks to him and they go to another bar when she gets off work.

So he takes her out twice to great restaurants, she's all into him texting all the time. He helps her move one day. Finally they have sex. He said it was great, no hiccups there. Great sex.

Now she's not texting him at all. When she does text, the tone is not sexual like it was before. He's ready to give up on her. Now is this because he's married and she sees no future in it? They've finally had sex and that's it? Or is it because he's been very nice to her with the nice restaurants, etc? She is 25 with 2 kids and her exes treat her s***ty. He's treated her so nice, is he getting the nice-guy dump?

 

My point is I've seen people meet and there's a storybook dating experience/marriage. And there's many many more who have to play the game constantly and it frustrates them. I would think once girls hit the age of 27, 28, they change a bit if they want to get married, have kids. I do know some hot 30 year olds at work who are single and even are staying home alone on weekend nights probably because they were too picky and finally opportunities let up to meet people, except at work.

Comments?

 

He's not a nice guy. He is cheating on his wife. He is a scumbag.

[whitesoxfan99]

my tip is always remember there is something to do. Dont sit there and be still and act like this girl or that girl is your whole life, because they arent. Get off your ass and go do something for you. Then when you arent looking, a girl will come hunting for you.

 

I actually agree with you here. Despite my complaints about this girl I've actually already gotten into touch with another girl I know has interest and am in the process of setting up a date with her and if the girl I have sort of been seeing does surface then great.