Rooftop Shots Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 (Wasn't sure which forum to place this in. It's an off the wall topic, but yet it's still baseball related. If it needs to be moved to The SLAM, please do so) Anyway, couldn't sleep worth a "dink" tonight, so I thought that since I was up and reading threads, that I would start one that was similar to one I did a few years ago. The idea is to take any baseball players name (past or present) and fit it into a sentence or quote to "punnerize" it (if there is such a word!!!) Since the last one was a few years ago, a lot have players have come and gone, and a lot more Soxtalk mermbers came on board, so let's see where we go with this. Here's a few to get started. I don't think that Jorge can do that! Oh yes! Jorge Cantu!!! Does he drink beer, or does Harmon Killebrew? If Roy Rogers wife is soaking wet, and Don Johnson towels her down, is that the same thing as saying that Don Drysdale? If he wants to slide down the staircase railing that's fine, after all it is Floyd's Bannister! There, you get the point! Yeah...it's pretty corny, but it makes your mind think in a "warped" fashion! Let's DIG for some REALLY clever ones. And Oh....no cheating by going back to the old version of this thread for ideas!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YASNY Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 See that couple on the beach by the facsimili machine ... That's right, it's Sandy Koufax The burglar has made his way down the California coast and now he's Robin Ventura. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Critic Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 I had a mechanical penis installed, but I knocked it loose during an intense "session", so now I need a Dick Allen wrench. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balta1701 Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 QUOTE (Rooftop Shots @ Mar 15, 2011 -> 04:13 AM) I don't think that Jorge can do that! Oh yes! Jorge Cantu!!! Nancy Faust already claimed this one by playing "Anything you cantu I cantu better" when he walked to the plate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigSqwert Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 My Gillette Mach 3 is getting old and dull. I remember first purchasing it and saying "Damn that Razor Shines!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Critic Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 I got some deer-lined jackets for Christmas last year - man, do I love those Buck Coates!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southsider2k5 Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 So that chick smelled kinda funny, turns out she had a Rusty... Oh nevermind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rooftop Shots Posted March 15, 2011 Author Share Posted March 15, 2011 QUOTE (southsider2k5 @ Mar 15, 2011 -> 01:04 PM) So that chick smelled kinda funny, turns out she had a Rusty... Oh nevermind. Yikes! I guess that "Oh Nevermind" was the correct response! As we now move on with. Need a good Chiropractor? Try Wally's Backman! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigSqwert Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 When asked by the arresting office why he had a gun to the buck's head, the assailant claimed that he liked to Rob Deer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clyons Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 QUOTE (southsider2k5 @ Mar 15, 2011 -> 01:04 PM) So that chick smelled kinda funny, turns out she had a Rusty... Oh nevermind. Sometimes, when I’m feeling a bit randy and naughty, I like to put on a trenchcoat, get my Garth Iorg, and then find a crowded street corner where I can Rance Mulliniks right there in public, with no one even knowing! . . . . or have I misapprehended the purpose of this thread? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rooftop Shots Posted March 16, 2011 Author Share Posted March 16, 2011 Need a job? Hey Scott, Proctor and gamble is hiring! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rooftop Shots Posted March 16, 2011 Author Share Posted March 16, 2011 If he keeps growing, will Grady Sizemore??? When you are in Texas, which Huston Street would you like to drive on? Bummer, I didn't get anything to eat. All I wanted was for Mark Teixeira slice of pizza with me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knightni Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 All I can think of are naughty ones... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
witesoxfan Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 HEY, DICK SUCH! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knightni Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 That round lobby roof annoys me Kosuke, Fukudome! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rooftop Shots Posted March 16, 2011 Author Share Posted March 16, 2011 QUOTE (knightni @ Mar 15, 2011 -> 09:38 PM) That round lobby roof annoys me Kosuke, Fukudome! clever Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ptatc Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 (edited) To rid the town of vampires you must Chuck Knoblauch at them. Edited March 16, 2011 by ptatc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YASNY Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 Went to a strip club with a buddy and there was one lady whose outstanding assets caught his eye. He eventually had to have a lap dance from her. So while I was watching this, I could see the those assets were drawing his focus. I, forgetting the no touch rule encouraged him with "Go ahead Jim, Palmer." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Chappas Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 Jim Parque or butter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knightni Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 Kirby went to a hockey game and a caught a rogue PuckEtt lodged in his forehead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rooftop Shots Posted March 16, 2011 Author Share Posted March 16, 2011 Wanted to visit a friend in Indiana. Couldn't which town he lived in. Let's see...St. John? No Valparaiso?? No. Hey Michael, Cuddyer Indiana be the correct town? Man, there are just too many dead people to be able to have all of these funerals at once. For loved ones to be able to view the bodies beforehand, maybe we ought to go outside and use Tim's Wakefield! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knightni Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 Kevin, Youkilis with your funny jokes! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChiliIrishHammock24 Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 QUOTE (knightni @ Mar 16, 2011 -> 12:02 PM) Kevin, Youkilis with your funny jokes! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChiliIrishHammock24 Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 I really thought I was a hillbilly piece of garbage who couldn't do anything right, but Adam Dunn f***ed up this time! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChiliIrishHammock24 Posted March 16, 2011 Share Posted March 16, 2011 I don't know amigo, I wanted two docks for my fishing boats, but I guess I'll have to deal with Juan Pierre. (hispanic accent) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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