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Great Sports Quotes


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Enjoy...some of these are pretty classic.

 

 

I’m working as hard as I can to get my life and my cash to run out at the same time. If I can just die after lunch Tuesday, everything will be perfect.

--Doug Sanders, professional golfer

 

All the fat guys watch me and say to their wives “See, there’s a fat guy doing okay. Bring me another beer."

--Mickey Lolich, Detroit Tigers Pitcher

 

Last year we couldn’t win at home and we were losing on the road. My failure as a coach was that I couldn’t think of anyplace else to play.

-- Harry Neale, professional hockey coach

 

When it’s third and ten, you can take the milk drinkers; I’ll take the whiskey drinkers every time.

-- Max McGee, Green Bay Packers receiver

 

I found out that it’s not good to talk about my troubles. Eighty percent of the people who hear them don’t care and the other twenty percent are glad you’re having trouble.

- Tommy LaSorda, LA Dodgers manager

 

My knees look like they lost a knife fight with a midget.

- E. J. Holub, Kansas City Chiefs linebacker regarding his 12 knee operations

 

My theory is that if you buy an ice-cream cone and make it hit your mouth, you can learn to play. If you stick it on your forehead, your chances aren't as good.

- Vic Braden, tennis instructor

 

Blind people come to the ballpark just to listen to him pitch.

- Reggie Jackson commenting on Tom Seaver

 

When they operated, I told them to put in a Koufax fastball. They did – but it was Mrs. Koufax’s.

- Tommy John N.Y. Yankees recalling his 1974 arm surgery

 

I don’t know. I only played there for nine years.

- Walt Garrison, Dallas Cowboys fullback when asked if Tom Landry ever smiles

 

We were tipping off our plays. Whenever we broke from the huddle, three backs were laughing and one was pale as a ghost.

- John Breen, Houston Oilers

 

The film looks suspiciously like the game itself.

- Bum Phillips, New Orleans Saints after viewing a lop-sided loss to the AtlantaFalcons

 

When I’m on the road, my greatest ambition is to get a standing boo.

- Al Hrabosky, major league relief pitcher

 

The only difference between me and General Custer is that I have to watch the films on Sunday.

- Rick Venturi, Northwestern football coach

 

I have discovered, in twenty years of moving around the ball park, that the knowledge of the game is usually in inverse proportion to the price of the seats.

- Bill Veeck, Chicago White Sox owner

 

Because if it didn’t work out, I didn’t want to blow the whole day.

- Paul Horning, Green Bay Packers running back on why his marriage ceremony was before noon.

 

I have a lifetime contract. That means I can’t be fired during the third quarter if we’re ahead and moving the ball.

- Lou Holtz, Arkansas football coach

 

I won’t know until my barber tells me on Monday.

- Knute Rockne, when asked why Notre Dame had lost a game

 

I tell him “Attaway to hit, George.”

- Jim Frey, K.C. Royals manager when asked what advice he gives George Brett on hitting

 

I learned a long time ago that “minor surgery” is when they do the operation on someone else, not you.

- Bill Walton, Portland Trial Blazers

 

Our biggest concern this season will be diaper rash.

- George MacIntyre, Vanderbilt football coach surveying the team roster that included 26 freshmen and 25 sophomores

 

 

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From Lee Elia, Chicago Cubs, Manager, in April, 1983 (before Wrigley Field had lights for night baseball), following a home loss to the Dodgers and in front of writers and microphones:

 

"F*ck those f*ckin' fans who come out here and say they're Cub fans that are supposed to be behind you, rippin' every f*ckin' thing you do. I'll tell you one f*ckin' thing, I hope we get f*ckin' hotter than sh*t, just to stuff it up them 3,000 f*ckin' people that show up every f*ckin' day, because if they're the real Chicago f*ckin' fans, they can kiss my f*ckin' ass right downtown and PRINT IT.

 

They're really, really behind you around here...my f*ckin' ass. What the f*ck am I supposed to do, go out there and let my f*ckin' players get destroyed every day and be quiet about it? For the f*ckin' nickel-dime people who turn up? The motherf*ckers don't even work. That's why they're out at the f*ckin' game. They oughta go out and get a f*ckin' job and find out what it's like to go out and earn a f*ckin' living. Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers. Rip them motherf*ckers. Rip them f*ckin' cocks*ckers like the f*ckin' players. We got guys bustin' their f*ckin' ass, and them f*ckin' people boo. And that's the Cubs? My f*ckin' ass. They talk about the great f*ckin' support the players get around here. I haven't see it this f*ckin' year. Everybody associated with this organization have been winners their whole f*ckin' life. Everybody. And the credit is not given in that respect.

 

Alright, they don't show because we're 5 and 14...and unfortunately, that's the criteria of them dumb fifteen motherf*ckin' percent that come out to day baseball. The other eighty-five percent are earning a living. I tell you, it'll take more than a 5 and 12 or 5 and 14 to destroy the makeup of this club. I guarantee you that. There's some f*ckin' pros out there that wanna win. But you're stuck in a f*ckin' stigma of the f*ckin' Dodgers and the Phillies and the Cardinals an all that cheap sh*t. It's unbelievable. It really is. It's a disheartening f*ckin' situation that we're in right now. Anybody who was associated with the Cub organization four or five years ago that came back and sees the multitude of progress that's been made will understand that if they're baseball people, that 5 and 14 doesn't negate all that work. We got 143 f*ckin' games left.

 

What I'm tryin' to say is don't rip them f*ckin' guys out there. Rip me. If you wanna rip somebody, rip my f*ckin' ass. But don't rip them f*ckin' guys 'cause they're givin' everything they can give. And right now they're tryin' to do more than God gave 'em, and that's why we make the simple mistakes. That's exactly why. "

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QUOTE (KyYlE23 @ Jun 9, 2011 -> 11:48 AM)
From Lee Elia, Chicago Cubs, Manager, in April, 1983 (before Wrigley Field had lights for night baseball), following a home loss to the Dodgers and in front of writers and microphones:

 

"F*ck those f*ckin' fans who come out here and say they're Cub fans that are supposed to be behind you, rippin' every f*ckin' thing you do. I'll tell you one f*ckin' thing, I hope we get f*ckin' hotter than sh*t, just to stuff it up them 3,000 f*ckin' people that show up every f*ckin' day, because if they're the real Chicago f*ckin' fans, they can kiss my f*ckin' ass right downtown and PRINT IT.

 

They're really, really behind you around here...my f*ckin' ass. What the f*ck am I supposed to do, go out there and let my f*ckin' players get destroyed every day and be quiet about it? For the f*ckin' nickel-dime people who turn up? The motherf*ckers don't even work. That's why they're out at the f*ckin' game. They oughta go out and get a f*ckin' job and find out what it's like to go out and earn a f*ckin' living. Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers. Rip them motherf*ckers. Rip them f*ckin' cocks*ckers like the f*ckin' players. We got guys bustin' their f*ckin' ass, and them f*ckin' people boo. And that's the Cubs? My f*ckin' ass. They talk about the great f*ckin' support the players get around here. I haven't see it this f*ckin' year. Everybody associated with this organization have been winners their whole f*ckin' life. Everybody. And the credit is not given in that respect.

 

Alright, they don't show because we're 5 and 14...and unfortunately, that's the criteria of them dumb fifteen motherf*ckin' percent that come out to day baseball. The other eighty-five percent are earning a living. I tell you, it'll take more than a 5 and 12 or 5 and 14 to destroy the makeup of this club. I guarantee you that. There's some f*ckin' pros out there that wanna win. But you're stuck in a f*ckin' stigma of the f*ckin' Dodgers and the Phillies and the Cardinals an all that cheap sh*t. It's unbelievable. It really is. It's a disheartening f*ckin' situation that we're in right now. Anybody who was associated with the Cub organization four or five years ago that came back and sees the multitude of progress that's been made will understand that if they're baseball people, that 5 and 14 doesn't negate all that work. We got 143 f*ckin' games left.

 

What I'm tryin' to say is don't rip them f*ckin' guys out there. Rip me. If you wanna rip somebody, rip my f*ckin' ass. But don't rip them f*ckin' guys 'cause they're givin' everything they can give. And right now they're tryin' to do more than God gave 'em, and that's why we make the simple mistakes. That's exactly why. "

 

THANK YOU!

 

I love the "those motherf***ers dont even work" line

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QUOTE (southsider2k5 @ Jun 9, 2011 -> 11:12 AM)
Wait Kyyle is a little Asian girl? Damn, I was wrong on that one.

 

All of my facebook pictures are stolen from some guy who lives in the NW suburbs and reposted. You got me

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The thing about Elia's rant is when he went insane the Cubs were 5-14. 9 games under .500.

After blowing all that smoke about "everyone in this organization being winners", they finished the season TWENTY games under .500.

If the 2011 White Sox finish 71-91, more than half the people on this board will have collapsed lungs from booing.

So who was right? The potty-mouth manager from the "organization full of winners", or the "15% of the world" Cub fans who knew they were seeing crap?

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  • 3 weeks later...

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