Parenting Thread

[iamshack]

When I had two kids in day care ours was $210 a week. With only one it dropped back to $140.

Buy one, get the second one for half price?

 

[southsider2k5]

The worst thing for me is when they're sick. You feel completely helpless.

 

The best thing for me is being called "Daddy." That owns.

 

The only thing better is roughhousing with your kids.

[southsider2k5]

Buy one, get the second one for half price?

 

 

Exactly actually.

[LittleHurt05]

Ours will be 375/week

 

Is that daycare or a nanny? My wife has already said that when the baby is still in its first year, she'd much rather have a full-time nanny than to stick the kid in a day-care with multiple kids taking away attention. But that's 40+ hours * $8-10/hour = NO BUENO.

[CanOfCorn]

Is that daycare or a nanny? My wife has already said that when the baby is still in its first year, she'd much rather have a full-time nanny than to stick the kid in a day-care with multiple kids taking away attention. But that's 40+ hours * $8-10/hour = NO BUENO.

 

But your wife is right...one on one time is great if you can find the right nanny. It is a financial hit, but our kids love the nanny and they have learned a lot. If you can't handle it financially, you can always try in-home day care. That's usually capped at 8 kids, but most places won't have 8. It's a little cheaper, but also well worth it.

[Jenksismyhero]

Is that daycare or a nanny? My wife has already said that when the baby is still in its first year, she'd much rather have a full-time nanny than to stick the kid in a day-care with multiple kids taking away attention. But that's 40+ hours * $8-10/hour = NO BUENO.

 

Yeah we went with a daycare. My wife toured the place and really liked their set up and all the people. They only have 12 kids max at a time, and they have like 8 full time teachers, so he's going to get a lot of one on one attention, but he'll also be socialized too. I would have gone the old lady at home route but unfortunately we don't really know anyone that does it. And I feel safer taking him to a daycare than finding someone on the internet or newspaper. That, and unless the old lady has 3-4 kids, it's just as expensive and you run the risk of not being protected by insurance if something happened.

 

What's worse is that doesn't include diapers or food (most don't). So it's actually more than that.

 

And for this area (i'm in La Grange, but Chicago metro area generally), 375/week is actually a pretty good deal. I've seen upwards of 8-900 a week at places downtown.

 

 

[Jenksismyhero]

I should add too that the price does go down after they hit like 15 months. I think it's only ~100 bucks less, but still.

[Iwritecode]

I would have gone the old lady at home route but unfortunately we don't really know anyone that does it.

 

I think we got incredibly lucky with our 3 kids. My wife's mom watched them for many years. We paid her but it was only like $100 a week. Even when they starting going to school we just had the buses pick them up and drop them off there.

[NorthSideSox72]

Ours will be 375/week

 

 

A WEEK? Where are you going to be taking him/her?

 

That is pretty commonplace for the Chicago suburbs, for a good place. Ours is in that territory, I think it was actually $400 a week to start, and goes down with each level, until $350 for pre-school. Our daughter just turned 3 and just moved up to preschool, she'll be in there another 2.5 years before starting kindergarten at the elementary school.

 

Now we have another due in June, so for about 2 years, our day care expenses will be about $700 a week (they do a small discount for multiple kids). That is $36,400 a year for that two years. Each kid, when they get to kindergarten, will have cost in day care tuition... $107,280.

 

Oh my god. I hadn't done that math until just now. ho. le. s***.

 

Thank god we moved somewhere that the public schools are excellent, so we can have a 13 year pause in paying school tuition. Then there's college.

 

Also worth noting, you can get cheaper than this. Or, amazingly, more expensive. We picked the place we thought was best, it happened to be the 2nd highest of the four we looked at. ALL of them were pricey, and we thought it was silly to shave off the last ten or twenty bucks a week for a lesser education.

 

Honest to God, I had not done that complete math until just now. Unbelievable.

 

 

[iamshack]

That is pretty commonplace for the Chicago suburbs, for a good place. Ours is in that territory, I think it was actually $400 a week to start, and goes down with each level, until $350 for pre-school. Our daughter just turned 3 and just moved up to preschool, she'll be in there another 2.5 years before starting kindergarten at the elementary school.

 

Now we have another due in June, so for about 2 years, our day care expenses will be about $700 a week (they do a small discount for multiple kids). That is $36,400 a year for that two years. Each kid, when they get to kindergarten, will have cost in day care tuition... $107,280.

 

Oh my god. I hadn't done that math until just now. ho. le. s***.

 

Thank god we moved somewhere that the public schools are excellent, so we can have a 13 year pause in paying school tuition. Then there's college.

 

Also worth noting, you can get cheaper than this. Or, amazingly, more expensive. We picked the place we thought was best, it happened to be the 2nd highest of the four we looked at. ALL of them were pricey, and we thought it was silly to shave off the last ten or twenty bucks a week for a lesser education.

 

Honest to God, I had not done that complete math until just now. Unbelievable.

There is almost a case for just having one parent not work to avoid those costs if you get much higher than that...

[LittleHurt05]

That is pretty commonplace for the Chicago suburbs, for a good place. Ours is in that territory, I think it was actually $400 a week to start, and goes down with each level, until $350 for pre-school. Our daughter just turned 3 and just moved up to preschool, she'll be in there another 2.5 years before starting kindergarten at the elementary school.

 

Now we have another due in June, so for about 2 years, our day care expenses will be about $700 a week (they do a small discount for multiple kids). That is $36,400 a year for that two years. Each kid, when they get to kindergarten, will have cost in day care tuition... $107,280.

 

Oh my god. I hadn't done that math until just now. ho. le. s***.

 

Thank god we moved somewhere that the public schools are excellent, so we can have a 13 year pause in paying school tuition. Then there's college.

 

Also worth noting, you can get cheaper than this. Or, amazingly, more expensive. We picked the place we thought was best, it happened to be the 2nd highest of the four we looked at. ALL of them were pricey, and we thought it was silly to shave off the last ten or twenty bucks a week for a lesser education.

 

Honest to God, I had not done that complete math until just now. Unbelievable.

 

Thanks guys. First thing I say to my wife tonight at dinner, "Changed my mind, no kids. Just another dog."

[NorthSideSox72]

There is almost a case for just having one parent not work to avoid those costs if you get much higher than that...

 

For some people, that is the way to go. In my case, my wife has a PhD she worked hard to get, and has no desire to leave the workforce. Neither do I. Fortunately, we both make more money than the cost of day care would be, so we are financially better both working, than one working.

 

Everyone's math is different. And it is way beyond math, of course. We just really like having our kid(s) be socialized in a more dynamic way, so "school" (day care) has that benefit. She has lots of fun, learns a ton, etc.

 

Thanks guys. First thing I say to my wife tonight at dinner, "Changed my mind, no kids. Just another dog."

 

Day care is but one possible path. Also, where you live, day care may be much cheaper. And one thing i forgot to add, you can take $5,000 a year of that cost as a tax deduction, which helps.

 

[southsider2k5]

For some people, that is the way to go. In my case, my wife has a PhD she worked hard to get, and has no desire to leave the workforce. Neither do I. Fortunately, we both make more money than the cost of day care would be, so we are financially better both working, than one working.

 

Everyone's math is different. And it is way beyond math, of course. We just really like having our kid(s) be socialized in a more dynamic way, so "school" (day care) has that benefit. She has lots of fun, learns a ton, etc.

 

 

Day care is but one possible path. Also, where you live, day care may be much cheaper. And one thing i forgot to add, you can take $5,000 a year of that cost as a tax deduction, which helps.

 

And it does make for a nice happy day when that refund hits the bank account on Valentines Day!

[Jenksismyhero]

For some people, that is the way to go. In my case, my wife has a PhD she worked hard to get, and has no desire to leave the workforce. Neither do I. Fortunately, we both make more money than the cost of day care would be, so we are financially better both working, than one working.

 

Everyone's math is different. And it is way beyond math, of course. We just really like having our kid(s) be socialized in a more dynamic way, so "school" (day care) has that benefit. She has lots of fun, learns a ton, etc.

 

 

 

Day care is but one possible path. Also, where you live, day care may be much cheaper. And one thing i forgot to add, you can take $5,000 a year of that cost as a tax deduction, which helps.

 

Have either of you guys been able to take the 5k pre-tax savings account "deduction," plus the child care credit? I'm guessing they don't allow you to do that, but I haven't looked.

[southsider2k5]

Have either of you guys been able to take the 5k pre-tax savings account "deduction," plus the child care credit? I'm guessing they don't allow you to do that, but I haven't looked.

 

Never looked into it honestly.

[NorthSideSox72]

Have either of you guys been able to take the 5k pre-tax savings account "deduction," plus the child care credit? I'm guessing they don't allow you to do that, but I haven't looked.

My wife's work does that, she pays in each paycheck, and we get money back, so it is pre-tax, for $5k a year. But you cannot also get the child care credit in addition - it is one or the other. You DO get the CHILD CREDIT, as dependent, either way.

 

[CanOfCorn]

My wife's work does that, she pays in each paycheck, and we get money back, so it is pre-tax, for $5k a year. But you cannot also get the child care credit in addition - it is one or the other. You DO get the CHILD CREDIT, as dependent, either way.

 

Do you know if both parents can do the pre-tax $5k a year? Or is it $5k per household? That's an issue I wasn't sure of.

[Jenksismyhero]

Do you know if both parents can do the pre-tax $5k a year? Or is it $5k per household? That's an issue I wasn't sure of.

 

5k per household

[CanOfCorn]

5k per household

 

(Crap)

[Tuna]

Here is the best tip you may ever get in your life regarding children. If your child is colicky (even slightly), put him/her under a ceiling fan. It will change your life.

 

I really enjoy being a father, my youngest is 4, every so often she'll pat my head and tell me "you're a good boy, daddy"...swear to god it's the best thing in the world. Can't even explain it.

[NorthSideSox72]

5k per household

 

Correct, and...

 

(Crap)

 

...also correct.

 

[Kyyle23]

Not married and not even close to ever having kids (I'm not getting any younger). But I can honestly say that I do not want kids.

 

Hope I never have to tell my mom that when I get married.

 

My best friend didn't want kids. He was really happy with the married downtown lifestyle, seeing shows with his wife whenever he wanted to, drinking until all hours and coming in when he wanted to. Me and Brian(ironic that is his name, no?) Both ended up getting our wives pregnant at the exact same time(not planned) and our sons were born 4 days apart.

 

Last time we visited them, about a month ago, Brian said to me "You know, I work 10-12 hour days. I deal with assholes all day long, and I'm taking a class on wednesdays and Fridays after work. I get maybe 45 minutes to an hour with Jack when I come home, and I get to play with him and put him in bed. It is the best 45 minutes to and hour of my entire day, I look forward to it all day long"

 

I honestly never thought I would hear him say something like that, and I have known Brian since I was 6 years old.

 

I am not saying you are like him and this will happen to you. All I am saying is do not discount it. Having a child is one of the best things that can happen to a person.

[iamshack]

My best friend didn't want kids. He was really happy with the married downtown lifestyle, seeing shows with his wife whenever he wanted to, drinking until all hours and coming in when he wanted to. Me and Brian(ironic that is his name, no?) Both ended up getting our wives pregnant at the exact same time(not planned) and our sons were born 4 days apart.

 

Last time we visited them, about a month ago, Brian said to me "You know, I work 10-12 hour days. I deal with assholes all day long, and I'm taking a class on wednesdays and Fridays after work. I get maybe 45 minutes to an hour with Jack when I come home, and I get to play with him and put him in bed. It is the best 45 minutes to and hour of my entire day, I look forward to it all day long"

 

I honestly never thought I would hear him say something like that, and I have known Brian since I was 6 years old.

 

I am not saying you are like him and this will happen to you. All I am saying is do not discount it. Having a child is one of the best things that can happen to a person.

I also think you can't really know whether you want kids until you fall in love and get married...having a kid isn't just something you think about from your own perspective...it's something that comes out of being with another person...so just wait...

[kapkomet]

I had my son and had a vasectomy. This thread should be about parenting for people who currently have children.

 

 

 

 

 

I know. I was kidding.

 

 

 

 

 

[kapkomet]

Have either of you guys been able to take the 5k pre-tax savings account "deduction," plus the child care credit? I'm guessing they don't allow you to do that, but I haven't looked.

 

 

No, you cannot do that, and yes, they will catch you.

 

The child care credit is only for after tax money spent.

 

And, the $5000 only equals a real $1000 credit.

 

/thank me