Educating Your Children

[iamshack]

Been researching this lately, now that I have a child and I know there are not good public schools in our district.

 

We've started looking at private preschools, and while I understand they can sort of double as day care, but holy cow!

 

Just was wondering what peoples' thoughts and experiences have been, whether it is worth it to invest a lot in this part of a child's education, etc.

 

 

[RockRaines]

I moved to a town with ridiculous taxes for the schools. So I guess it's worth the investment hopefully.

[LittleHurt05]

I moved to a town with ridiculous taxes for the schools. So I guess it's worth the investment hopefully.

 

Same here

[cabiness42]

Back in 2007, a year before our first child was born, we bought a house in what we knew to be a poor school district because the property taxes were very low and it was a 4 mile commute to work for me. The plan at the time was to sell and move after 5 years, before any kids were in school. Housing market immediately crashed and here we are 8½ years later, still without enough equity in the house to be able to afford a down payment on another house. Between the slight market recovery, and money we've been able to save since we became a two income family again almost a year ago, we expect to finally be able to move to the neighboring (and much better) school district next year, though our price range will be about 10-15% lower than what we had hoped.

[Texsox]

My wife teaches at a very expensive private school, I teach at a large public high school. What you get, for better or worse, at private schools are very involved parents and smaller class sizes. There will also be more character education and if that happens to line up with the values you are teaching your child, it is probably a good thing. If you have some specific questions PM me.

 

Keep in mind that people who are unhappy are 100x more likely to post, write reviews, etc. Visit the schools, watch classes, talk with the teachers, ask about their experience and credentials. Also put on your critical thinking cap. One of the charter schools advertises that 100% of their students are accepted to a college. As a class requirement they must apply at the local community college who accepts every student. Boom 100% acceptance. There is another that achieved 100% passing on the state tests. Their entrance requirements pretty much guarantee that happening, they deny admissions to any child who has ever failed a state test. They also purge their rolls right before the state deadlines. So the kids bounce from their schools, we pick them up for a month or two, they fail the state tests, and we look like failures. YMMV

[iamshack]

Thanks for everyone for the replies.

 

Vegas is interesting. The school system in general is not particularly good. There are certainly some standout private schools, and there are some good public schools, but that is more the exception than the rule. Most of Las Vegas has very low property taxes, so the school system is just not funded well. Vegas residents are so accustomed to the Gaming industry subsidizing every facet of life that it's almost like an addiction one must ween them off of. There are some new areas which have very good school districts, due to much higher property taxes.

 

My wife and I have been researching the cost of private preschools. They generally range from about $400/month to $1500/month. Some are half-day programs, some are full-day. Some are 2-3 days a week, some are 5 days a week.

 

Our son spends his days with my wife's parents and her brother. They spoil him rotten. So I am not too concerned about him not getting the kind of socialization or attention he needs at this age (6 months). I'm really wondering if we would get a large benefit for shelling out for some fancy preschool when my guess is he is getting quite a bit of this with his grandparents already.

 

At this point, I am leaning towards maybe 3 days a week in the half-day program, which at one of the schools we are looking at, is about $420/mo. Then we can evaluate from there. Of course, this is all still 2.5 years away, but I want to be prepared.

 

The other option is to move to one of the few areas of Las Vegas I mentioned above with better school districts. This would come at a high price, but might be a better investment overall. I guess that is a decision we may have to make further on down the road.

[southsider2k5]

Parental involvement and early education are way more important than the school the kid attends.

[LDF]

Been researching this lately, now that I have a child and I know there are not good public schools in our district.

 

We've started looking at private preschools, and while I understand they can sort of double as day care, but holy cow!

 

Just was wondering what peoples' thoughts and experiences have been, whether it is worth it to invest a lot in this part of a child's education, etc.

 

i am all for the private, religious kind of school, b/c of the quality of the school, class and most importantly the social interactions of the children.

 

i told my cuz of my ideas with a reminder to emphasize on religious freedom for children.

 

i point blank stated the social interaction. that is soooo much needed in an important part of children growing up.

[iamshack]

i am all for the private, religious kind of school, b/c of the quality of the school, class and most importantly the social interactions of the children.

 

i told my cuz of my ideas with a reminder to emphasize on religious freedom for children.

 

i point blank stated the social interaction. that is soooo much needed in an important part of children growing up.

The religious part of this equation I could live without.

 

I don't believe there is a pre-requisite to have religion involved in any way in a quality education. Are there overlapping values that both share? Of course.

 

 

[RockRaines]

The religious part of this equation I could live without.

 

I don't believe there is a pre-requisite to have religion involved in any way in a quality education. Are there overlapping values that both share? Of course.

Yeah, I prefer not to have that included whatsoever.

[Chisoxfn]

So shack, our close to 2.5 year old started at a montesorri school when she got around 20 months (in what I think most schools call a "Toddler" program). Prior to that she was watched by a combination of my mom and mother/father in-law and once we had our 2nd, we knew it was time to send our little one to school (otherwise too much to ask for our parents).

 

We had already been researching schools and found one in our area that we liked a ton. The difference in cost in our area was very minimal so no matter the school/daycare (full day), you were looking at somewhere between $1000 - 1500 / month. We went to quite a few and than picked the one we ultimately felt most comfortable with (helped that we knew some people who had used the school). Combination of recommendations and our gut feel were helpful and we also did a once a week mommy / daddy & me class at the facility, which firmed our thoughts.

 

The big goal for us was obviously a combination of alleviating the parents, but also it was for our daughter. We wanted her to benefit from the social interactions she didn't get as much of staying at home and also just the overall enrichment in terms of activities (while we would try we couldn't make our house be like a school...just harder and grandparents don't want to be the disciplinarians either so while they were watching, we had to deal with the inconsistent discipline which would be frustrating. Since our daughter as started, the only real downside I can see (other than the cost) is the colds that come with it (But it strengthen's the immune system). She has a ton of fun and is excited every morning for school. She's also became far more independent and self confident.

 

All that said, the cost is absurd and it took me a long time to get comfortable with it (afterall, it was more than my tuition and cost of books for a semester at college when I started college), but at the end of the day, we couldn't be happier with our decision. We love her teacher and the assistant teachers and we've gotten a little parent / kid group together for other activities as well (which was nice since most of our friends haven't had kids yet..at least the ones that live around us).

 

Now our daughter gets the involvement from us (and we are super involved), plus time with her grandparents (goes their when school ends so she can play with her cousin and see her lil brother who gets watched). I'm just not looking forward to when our son starts in a bit and we are doubling down on those payments. The whole sibling 10% off discount isn't super helpful, haha. Oh and one of the reasons we went with the 5 day vs. the 3 day is we read and talked to people and kind of determined that ultimately the more consistent the routine for the young child the better. Given our daughter, I think if we had done a 3 day program, she'd still be adjusting (she was super clingy to her mom and especially me).

 

On the grand scheme of things though, I think the key is parental invovlement and early education. Ultimately as long as they are in a "safe" place and get parental involvement and access to learning, that is huge. It is also important that they are encouraged to do/try to do things on their own (they quickly become little people and as they learn to do things on their own and you see how proud they are and confident, you can't help but smile).

[LDF]

The religious part of this equation I could live without.

 

I don't believe there is a pre-requisite to have religion involved in any way in a quality education. Are there overlapping values that both share? Of course.

 

yeah so could i, but down here, a very different baptist school has a great program, but they teach their religion and the bible.

 

but the educational part is great.

[bigruss]

I grew up in great school districts (Oak Park and then Ann Arbor) and it really did help attending them, my high school had a fantastic reputation, offered a ton of support, had plenty of AP courses and prepped you well for college.

 

That said, when I was at the U of I there were a ton of students from school districts that sucked. Obviously they were intelligent individuals but you could tell that they had great role models in their life. So essentially what I believe is that schools make an impact, but not as much as the support system around the student (and there is give and take between parents, community, and the school system).

 

 

Also, I grew up right next to a private school (but I went to public school), those kids were nasty and insufferable. So glad my parents didn't send me there.

[RockRaines]

I grew up in great school districts (Oak Park and then Ann Arbor) and it really did help attending them, my high school had a fantastic reputation, offered a ton of support, had plenty of AP courses and prepped you well for college.

 

That said, when I was at the U of I there were a ton of students from school districts that sucked. Obviously they were intelligent individuals but you could tell that they had great role models in their life. So essentially what I believe is that schools make an impact, but not as much as the support system around the student (and there is give and take between parents, community, and the school system).

 

 

Also, I grew up right next to a private school (but I went to public school), those kids were nasty and insufferable. So glad my parents didn't send me there.

The pressure around here to send your kids to Fenwick is hilarious. If they only saw my tax bill and why I wouldnt ever spend that much more money.

[iamshack]

So shack, our close to 2.5 year old started at a montesorri school when she got around 20 months (in what I think most schools call a "Toddler" program). Prior to that she was watched by a combination of my mom and mother/father in-law and once we had our 2nd, we knew it was time to send our little one to school (otherwise too much to ask for our parents).

 

We had already been researching schools and found one in our area that we liked a ton. The difference in cost in our area was very minimal so no matter the school/daycare (full day), you were looking at somewhere between $1000 - 1500 / month. We went to quite a few and than picked the one we ultimately felt most comfortable with (helped that we knew some people who had used the school). Combination of recommendations and our gut feel were helpful and we also did a once a week mommy / daddy & me class at the facility, which firmed our thoughts.

 

The big goal for us was obviously a combination of alleviating the parents, but also it was for our daughter. We wanted her to benefit from the social interactions she didn't get as much of staying at home and also just the overall enrichment in terms of activities (while we would try we couldn't make our house be like a school...just harder and grandparents don't want to be the disciplinarians either so while they were watching, we had to deal with the inconsistent discipline which would be frustrating. Since our daughter as started, the only real downside I can see (other than the cost) is the colds that come with it (But it strengthen's the immune system). She has a ton of fun and is excited every morning for school. She's also became far more independent and self confident.

 

All that said, the cost is absurd and it took me a long time to get comfortable with it (afterall, it was more than my tuition and cost of books for a semester at college when I started college), but at the end of the day, we couldn't be happier with our decision. We love her teacher and the assistant teachers and we've gotten a little parent / kid group together for other activities as well (which was nice since most of our friends haven't had kids yet..at least the ones that live around us).

 

Now our daughter gets the involvement from us (and we are super involved), plus time with her grandparents (goes their when school ends so she can play with her cousin and see her lil brother who gets watched). I'm just not looking forward to when our son starts in a bit and we are doubling down on those payments. The whole sibling 10% off discount isn't super helpful, haha. Oh and one of the reasons we went with the 5 day vs. the 3 day is we read and talked to people and kind of determined that ultimately the more consistent the routine for the young child the better. Given our daughter, I think if we had done a 3 day program, she'd still be adjusting (she was super clingy to her mom and especially me).

 

On the grand scheme of things though, I think the key is parental invovlement and early education. Ultimately as long as they are in a "safe" place and get parental involvement and access to learning, that is huge. It is also important that they are encouraged to do/try to do things on their own (they quickly become little people and as they learn to do things on their own and you see how proud they are and confident, you can't help but smile).

Thanks Jason, that is very helpful. The cost is indeed ridiculous. It's going to make me think about just moving to a different part of town and taking advantage of the public schools, as much as that will be a difficult decision to make.

[Chisoxfn]

Thanks Jason, that is very helpful. The cost is indeed ridiculous. It's going to make me think about just moving to a different part of town and taking advantage of the public schools, as much as that will be a difficult decision to make.

Yeah - The city we live in has fantastic public schools, so once they are old enough to transition, they will (so in my eyes, this is a temporary cost, of course some of that cost will transition to other things as the kids get older and more expensive, whether sporting activities, gymnastics, etc). This is more of the education/daycare before you can get into public school. I think it isn't until like 5 that you can send your kids to public school (or something like that). We probably will keep our child in the program for an extra year (when public opens) but that will be more because the school is only a few hours that first year so you'd have to pay for a 2nd form of daycare anyway so at that point, we'd rather her just stay in the same school for a little longer.

 

LDF said it more concise, but I am a big believer in socialization and independence/independent play time.

[iamshack]

The pressure around here to send your kids to Fenwick is hilarious. If they only saw my tax bill and why I wouldnt ever spend that much more money.

Hah, I am actually a Fenwick grad

 

I didn't care much for my experience there. I don't speak to anyone I went to high school with. In fact, my 20 year reunion was a few months ago, and while it was nice to see what some of those guys were doing these days via Facebook, I was not in the least tempted to go. That being said, I had to attend a wedding in Ohio that weekend anyways, so it wasn't even a decision I had to make.

 

However, I firmly believe the education I received there was invaluable. I really learned to communicate well there. The biggest takeaways were the english and writing classes. While I really honed those skills in law school at Depaul, I'm not sure how well I would have done in law school (or even gotten in) if not for the foundation set at Fenwick.

[LDF]

 

i have stated this several times before in how i grew up and the problems i encounter including the point of children being hurt at school .....

 

so as i said, this school down here is like an baptist academy, from 2 yr preschool till 8th grade.

 

they ask for the parents to come in and help in the sports aspect of the school, baseball, boy / girls, football, soccer etc....

 

but that is done by parents, but they concertate of education.

 

i like this program.

[LittleHurt05]

So shack, our close to 2.5 year old started at a montesorri school when she got around 20 months (in what I think most schools call a "Toddler" program). Prior to that she was watched by a combination of my mom and mother/father in-law and once we had our 2nd, we knew it was time to send our little one to school (otherwise too much to ask for our parents).

 

We had already been researching schools and found one in our area that we liked a ton. The difference in cost in our area was very minimal so no matter the school/daycare (full day), you were looking at somewhere between $1000 - 1500 / month. We went to quite a few and than picked the one we ultimately felt most comfortable with (helped that we knew some people who had used the school). Combination of recommendations and our gut feel were helpful and we also did a once a week mommy / daddy & me class at the facility, which firmed our thoughts.

 

The big goal for us was obviously a combination of alleviating the parents, but also it was for our daughter. We wanted her to benefit from the social interactions she didn't get as much of staying at home and also just the overall enrichment in terms of activities (while we would try we couldn't make our house be like a school...just harder and grandparents don't want to be the disciplinarians either so while they were watching, we had to deal with the inconsistent discipline which would be frustrating. Since our daughter as started, the only real downside I can see (other than the cost) is the colds that come with it (But it strengthen's the immune system). She has a ton of fun and is excited every morning for school. She's also became far more independent and self confident.

 

All that said, the cost is absurd and it took me a long time to get comfortable with it (afterall, it was more than my tuition and cost of books for a semester at college when I started college), but at the end of the day, we couldn't be happier with our decision. We love her teacher and the assistant teachers and we've gotten a little parent / kid group together for other activities as well (which was nice since most of our friends haven't had kids yet..at least the ones that live around us).

 

Now our daughter gets the involvement from us (and we are super involved), plus time with her grandparents (goes their when school ends so she can play with her cousin and see her lil brother who gets watched). I'm just not looking forward to when our son starts in a bit and we are doubling down on those payments. The whole sibling 10% off discount isn't super helpful, haha. Oh and one of the reasons we went with the 5 day vs. the 3 day is we read and talked to people and kind of determined that ultimately the more consistent the routine for the young child the better. Given our daughter, I think if we had done a 3 day program, she'd still be adjusting (she was super clingy to her mom and especially me).

 

On the grand scheme of things though, I think the key is parental invovlement and early education. Ultimately as long as they are in a "safe" place and get parental involvement and access to learning, that is huge. It is also important that they are encouraged to do/try to do things on their own (they quickly become little people and as they learn to do things on their own and you see how proud they are and confident, you can't help but smile).

 

Our daughter was home with my wife until about 15 months, then we started sending her to a "school" for 6 hours x 3 days a week. I definitely noticed a positive influence with the social interactions, structure, etc. I think we will do the same with my son once he is old enough too, depending how quickly he develops.

 

It does suck to pay the extra money, but there's no doubt how much it helps.

[RockRaines]

Hah, I am actually a Fenwick grad

 

I didn't care much for my experience there. I don't speak to anyone I went to high school with. In fact, my 20 year reunion was a few months ago, and while it was nice to see what some of those guys were doing these days via Facebook, I was not in the least tempted to go. That being said, I had to attend a wedding in Ohio that weekend anyways, so it wasn't even a decision I had to make.

 

However, I firmly believe the education I received there was invaluable. I really learned to communicate well there. The biggest takeaways were the english and writing classes. While I really honed those skills in law school at Depaul, I'm not sure how well I would have done in law school (or even gotten in) if not for the foundation set at Fenwick.

They love having the Fenwick reunions at our Club. That party gets ridiculously raunchy.

[LittleHurt05]

The pressure around here to send your kids to Fenwick is hilarious. If they only saw my tax bill and why I wouldnt ever spend that much more money.

 

People move to Park Ridge then still send their kids to Notre Dame or Loyola HS. Double financial whammy.

[NorthSideSox72]

Pre-K schooling is very important, and I think it gets underutilized and underappreciated. I say that having under-appreciated it myself before. I'll be honest and say, because my wife and I both worked full time, we just saw Day Care as only that. But we did pick a school we really liked, and looking back I am soooooo glad we invested in a place that was truly a school versus just a day care. It costs a lot - about $1600/month per kid, which over 5 years is like a college education - but it has been amazing what they do. Finding the right pre-K school is key.

 

We did what a lot of Chicago couples do. Lived in the city when married, and for the first kid. Second kid was being discussed, running out of room and had school concerns, so we moved to Northbrook. Property taxes are about 4k/year more than our city condo, but that is far, far less than private school tuition. And the public schools here are excellent.

 

[hogan873]

Parental involvement and early education are way more important than the school the kid attends.

I couldn't agree more. My wife and I are heavily involved with our kids and their schoolwork, and I believe that at least part of their success is due to that. Now that our oldest is in high school and taking a bunch of AP classes, our ability to help is dwindling, but what we've taught her in the past about working hard, asking questions, etc. is helping with the learning process.

 

Another thing that we firmly believe that helps is playing an instrument. All three of our kids play instruments and are involved in several bands/orchestras. In addition to reading music helping with other learnings, the social aspect is huge. I think this true with sports and other activities (clubs, committees, etc.), too.

[LDF]

Pre-K schooling is very important, and I think it gets underutilized and underappreciated. I say that having under-appreciated it myself before. I'll be honest and say, because my wife and I both worked full time, we just saw Day Care as only that. But we did pick a school we really liked, and looking back I am soooooo glad we invested in a place that was truly a school versus just a day care. It costs a lot - about $1600/month per kid, which over 5 years is like a college education - but it has been amazing what they do. Finding the right pre-K school is key.

 

We did what a lot of Chicago couples do. Lived in the city when married, and for the first kid. Second kid was being discussed, running out of room and had school concerns, so we moved to Northbrook. Property taxes are about 4k/year more than our city condo, but that is far, far less than private school tuition. And the public schools here are excellent.

 

also think this..... security.... how much is that worth???

 

this is one story i will repeat. i grew up tough.

 

i was in 5th grade, i went to the boy club on 24th. i was in involve in a situation where i was stabbed and i did some other things. they were against a group call the youngs blah.. blahh.

 

i was force to go to some other place for 1 1/2 yrs without my parents....

 

the main point is security of the child in a nice educational system.

[Jenksismyhero]

So this is an interesting topic with my wife and I expecting #2. We're debating whether to do more daycare or find a nanny. Our son is 3.5. He's been in a daycare with a good curriculum since he was old enough to go. It's a structured daycare with a class schedule, even when they were infants, and it's not cheap. My son's 3 year old room is about $1,300/month. The newborn will be closer to $1,800. Combined that's a decent vacation home.

 

Since I like to save money wherever possible, I've been trying to talk my wife into a nanny. It would probably be cheaper and more convenient, especially when the 3.5 year old starts school and gets into more outdoor activities (all of which start at 3 or 4pm in the afternoon....where do these parents work??) But we really like the structure that our daycare provides, as well as the HUGE social component. We have 7 kids in our group of friends. 2 stay at home with their mom or in-laws and it's readily apparent. Way behind in language and don't really play well in social groups. They're not dumb kids, they're just behind compared to the others. Nanny's/parents/in-laws have to be REALLY structured and have lesson plans and all that I think to get to the same level.

 

But the question is, how much is that worth? If by 5-6 years old, they've caught up and they're all basically on the same level, that's a lot of money on school that could be spent elsewhere. My wife wants the daycare/teachers again. I say let's talk nanny, or at minimum, maybe part time nanny and 2-3 days a week at daycare. Get the benefit of both.

Edited December 14, 2015 by Jenksismybitch